Chapter 10

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     Mitch had tried speaking with Kitt, but the boy was unreachable. He was thinking that it was better this way.

"Cassidy is too good for the likes of me anyway. I don't even know what I was thinking. Jerrod should have kicked my ass, I deserved it."

"Stop talking out of your ass boy. It's not like you fucked the woman."

"Well..."

Mitch looked at his son like he wanted to smack him over the head. And he might still do. "You fucked her? Boy, are you dense? A kiss is nothing but a screw? That it's a fatal blow to a girl. It's why your mama left my ass."

Kitt shook his head and took a swig directly from the bottle of Jack Daniels. I was mad that she blocked me on her socials and she didn't call me. So when Lorenna called that night I went out with her and... I fucked up okay Dad, I know that."

"Well, I hope it was a spectacular lay my boy because I don't see you getting out of this one."

"I like Cassidy a lot, I care about her but I don't think I'm good enough for her. I'm all fucked up and it's not like I can forget all the shit I went through. Maybe I sabotaged myself on purpose because I refuse to have anything worth a damn."

"Are you taking your pills? Don't stop now; you were doing better."

"Yeah, I am, don't worry. Maybe I was thinking of heading back to Omaha. I'm sure Jerrod is gonna can my ass anyway. I tried to clean up the mess at the shop but Cassidy did a number in that bay. I told Deny to take the cost out of my pay."

"I am part owner of that shop boy. I'll talk to Jerrod if you want to stay. I love having you back here with me but I understand if you want to take a break. Don't decide anything just yet, okay? Go after hours to work on Baccarin's bike. I'll go with you so there is no issue. I don't want you to make any rash decisions because you can see what that brought you already. Lay low for a few, let me talk to Jerr, and one last thing I want to say, well maybe a couple of things. I know Baccarin is your Farrah Fawcett, so I get it, but if there is one thing I still regret to this day it's not fighting for your mama. Cassidy might deserve better just like your mama did, but you live and learn Kitt. If I had fought for Fionna I would have never strayed again. To this fucking day I haven't found a woman that makes me feel like your ma did. You know your heart better than anyone boy. If you think it's love, fight like a motherfucker, don't make the same mistake as your old man." he said hugging his boy and walking out to the porch to call Jerrod.

Kitt put down the bottle of Jack Daniels and went to take a bath. He put in some Epsom salt and some lavender bomb that Cassidy had left there. She was always taking care of him. He closed his eyes and thought of riding next to Cassidy on their bikes. Her joyous laugh as she snatched his hat and went off running on the beach so he could catch her. Her bringing him lunch and looking at him expectantly, waiting to hear his praise. She even had a full notebook of recipes she wanted to make for him. Her teasing smile when they were in bed and she wanted more loving. Everything about her was beautiful to him. He felt the tears fall down his face and thought back on the last day he had cried. It had been when he had come back from the last tour and he had seen his mom. She had embraced him and it had been like the dam breaking. He had lost his whole unit save for Orlando, who had been hiding in the foxhole with him. They had come out to find pieces of their friends scattered all around. Then they had to gather what they could and put it in bags along with the dog tags. He could still see it at night when he fell asleep without taking his meds. He knew he was overdosing on sleeping pills but it was the only way to keep the night terrors at bay. If he still had them he could not remember. Maybe he should go visit Orlando, and see how he was doing. He wanted to call Cassidy but she would probably hang up. He told her to call him when she was ready and he didn't want to rush her either, because he didn't know what the fuck was best. He dozed off thanks to the Jack, which he was well aware should not go to prom with his meds but fuck it, what was done was done. The smell of gunpowder woke him with a start and a curse. It took him a minute to situate himself. He was in a tub of cold water not in the middle of a war zone, and what he smelled was not gunpowder it was his dad burning something in the kitchen.

The repeated cursing and banging of the pan was a clear giveaway of the situation. Kitt got out of the tub and went to help his dad not burn the house down.

After throwing the pot of very burned meat sauce out the kitchen window Mitch told Kitt to get dressed because they were going to grab some burgers for dinner. Kitt didn't want to go but he relented. If he returned to Omaha there was no telling when he would see his old man again.

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