Waiting for Jhoyz

five

" please dont talk to me anymore Yonghwa. This is the last time Im going to see you or talk to you."
I told him keeping my voice neutral.

He was surprised. He tried to say something but I ran inside the subdivision and didnt look back.
Even when he shout my name. I just walk hurriedly away from him. Tears falling from my eyes.

The days that followed didnt really register in my mind.
I wake up, prepare for school and work on my thesis.

Then I will go home eat with my family and I sleep.

Everyday is like that.

Its like Im a zombie. Just going on with my life without. My brain is on auto pilot.

I never go to the library anymore because I know Yonghwa is friends with the librarian- Mr. Lee. I might see him and I dont want that. I also dont eat at the cafeteria anymore. I just sit on the shelf in the ladies room. There is a ledge inside that overlooks the grounds. I can see people walking and running. During my free time I just sit there and look out the window.

I dont really have friends at school. Though I have classmates who walks with me to class and share some stories with. I dont have a close friend whom I can share what I feel. I just keep to myself.

Its only him who I shared my time and enjoyed it. But I dont have him anymore. Because I cant have him.

A week before graduation daddy, my grandfather and mommy asked me to accompany him to an event. Its the annual ball with the top companies CEO in attendance. Everyone was wearing mask as the theme for that year is masquerade ball.

I wear a princess style dress in baby pink silk and lace, complete with a tiara. I also wear a mask with gold accent on the edge.

Daddy brought someone to our table and mommy whisphered to me that its my fiance. My heart sank. So thats why they ask me to come.

He held out his hand asking for a dance and I place my hand in his. We waltz to the song being played by a violinist. The masked guy smiled at me and say something but I cant hear him clearly so I just smiled at him.

After the song he led me to the terrace. I look at the garden the trees are being lit by thousands of tealights it was so magical.
If only Yonghwa is here to see it too, I know he will like it.

" youre so quiet." The masked guy said. I just ' hmmm' and look at the trees again.

I close my eyes and I remember when Yonghwa hug me near the fishpond. I remember his face when he told me that it hurts to see me cry. I hug myself feeling so cold all of a sudden. I felt so lonely.

" are you ok? " Mr. Masked guy asked again. I just shake my head.

" I want to go home..." I said in a small voice. I almost felt like crying. I miss Yonghwa so much!

" Jhoyz..please dont cry.." He said but I didnt look up at him.
I just hold my hand together in front of me and ask him to call my mom.

He hesitated a bit and place a hand on my shoulder. " dont cry.." He said, gave me his hanky and left.

After a few minutes mom found me and I said I have a headache and I want to go home. I felt so weak and light headed. We were walking when I swayed and fainted.

I just heard a voice calling my name. My eyes fluttered open, I know that voice. Hes here...but then darkness overatake me and I just close my eyes.