F*cking the Enemy

32

This cloudy morning your head is pounding, you feel bloated and nauseous. Must be all the drinking from the day before, but also, as you look to your side, you notice Jungkook is not there. He's not in the bathroom either so you start getting up with a pit forming in your stomach. This doesn't feel right.
Convincing yourself that everything will be okay, you exit the room in a rush, hoping Tae won't notice your absence. You sigh with relief when you notice JK sitting on one of the benches in the patio; you smile and join him. But now that you take a good look at him, he's wearing all his clothes, even his belt. Why would he need to do that? Is he going anywhere?
-Bunny, is everything okay?
-I wanted to have a talk with you...- he responds after a few seconds, petrifying you in your seat.
-What is it?- you ask with a dry throat.
-I haven't been feeling well, I don't... This arrangement isn't working for me...
-What do you mean?- you ask knowing all too well what he's referring to, but it will give you enough time to find a way to stall him, to think of a way of convincing him that everything will be ok...
-I haven't been fully honest Noona, I do have a problem sharing you... I see the way you guys are, you guys are so close... how well you get along... Every time I see you and Taehyung I feel like I'm in the way...
-But I love you Jungkook, I'm in love with you... You could never be in the way...
-I know that, but I can't do it anymore... Not to mention Namjoon too... How you guys look at each other...
-Bunny please, don't do this... I'll make it up to you...- you interrupt him desperately-...let's spend more time together, just you and I...
-No, that's not going to solve it... I need to step away... let you be...
-No please Jungkook, don't say that... I can't let you...- you're starting to panic, he can't be seriously thinking that.
-It's not your fault... I should have treated you right, I should have claimed you from the beginning...- he says standing up but you're holding his wrists firmly, tears streaming down your face.
-No! You promised, you said you'd be with me forever!
-I'm sorry baby, but I can't do this...
-No, wait!
He forcefully yanks his wrists from your grasp one by one and starts heading for the door. You're not processing, you're stuck in your spot, angry and hurt, incredulously refusing to believe he's actually leaving. After all these years, after all the shit you put up with... But also all the times he saved your ass, your life... How he tried so hard to make you happy, even when it killed him.
Suddenly you snap back into place and run outside after him...
-What are you even going to do? Where are you going? Let's just think about this!
-I'm sure I'll be okay, I'll talk to Seokjin and...
-No! Why? What about our plans?! All the things you said you wanted with me!!!
-I'm sorry but I'm not the one for you...- he says painfully and stubbornly.
-DON'T SAY THAT!!! WE BELONG TOGETHER!!!
-WHY?! IS IT GRATEFULNESS?! PITY?! ARE YOU JUST... USED TO ME OR SOMETHING?!
-NO JUNGKOOK, YOU KNOW HOW MUCH I LOVE YOU!!!
He calms down and locks eyes with you, he looks so beautiful with his hair grown out and his cheeks reddened by his strong emotions.
-I know, but you love him too...- he lowers his voice with glassy eyes, the hurt in his tone breaks your heart.
-Baby, baby... please I can't do this without you...- you surrender to his feet, his doe eyes watching you from above as you desperately moan with pain and your voice trembles.
-Yes, you can...- he consoles you, kneeling down and holding your nervous hands in his.
-Baby please don't leave me... Don't leave me Jungkook...- your voice comes out hoarse and shaky, pain like you've never experienced before stabs every cell all over your body, stealing all the air in your lungs and splitting your head in two.
-You have to let me do this Noona, this is just something I have to do...
-I'll go with you!
-And leave him? You'de be in pain every day, missing him... It would drive me crazy...
-I'll do anything, please I beg you...- you whine and pull his shirt, you can't see his godly, gorgeous face anymore through your swollen eyes...
-Maybe one day we'll see each other again... We can keep in touch... I'd want to know you're okay...
-No, I need you here...- you weep, wail, sobbing incontrolably; but he raises to his feet and looks behind him towards a cab that has been parked on the street for a while.
-You need to let me go Noona... This is just something I have to do now... Or I will go insane...
You crumble and let go of his hand, sinking into the sand, every step he takes further away from you feels like a punch in your stomach. You can't believe this. This has to be a nightmare... A sick fucking joke...
A few minutes go by before someone notices you and comes running to your aid, sinking into the ground with you and firmly holding your arms.
-What happened?!- Taehyung inquires alarmed and confused.
-He left...
-What?!
-Jungkook... le... left...- you repeat, still in an absurd amount of pain, crushingly tortured as Taehyung cradles you and soothes you while you sob.
-It's ok... It's gonna be okay...
You scream and wail, he kisses your head and rubs every inch of your skin he can find.
-I'm still here angel, I'm not going anywhere... I would never leave you...
You cry some more, you punch the ground, you curse at the winds... After a while he carries you inside and places you back in bed. Maybe you'll wake up and Kookie will be there. Maybe this was all indeed a nightmare...

(...)

After many times in which both Namjoon and Taehyung tried their best to cheer you up, you're still attached to your bed. You've barely eaten anything the past few days but still feel nauseous every morning.
You know nothing of Jungkook, you've called him dozens of times by now but he never answered. This particular morning your screen was alight without any important notifications when a strong desire to puke sprung you up and made you dart to the bathroom.
-You okay, princess? -Taehyung's muffled voice came from behind the door.
-I'm okay...- you respond mechanically after throwing up, grabbing your phone and suddenly realizing your period is at least two weeks late.
You never missed your birth control shot, it could be stress... But as you look at yourself in the mirror, you know, you just know...