Enzo

Letter

Lillian's pov:

I turned on the shower and went to sit on the bed.

I was holding the letter Lorenzo gave me, I recognised the handwriting. It was Zane's.

I don't know if I was ready to open it yet. I don't know if I had fully processed it, maybe this letter will give me closure.

My hands were trembling when I opened the envelope.

I took a deep breath and started reading.

Dear Bubs,

I wanted to apologize for leaving you, I should have said goodbye in a proper way but I couldn't face you anymore, you would beg me to stay and never leave my side. I didn't want you to go through that. You couldn't have stopped me Lilly. I am in a dark place and there is no way out for me. I know I should have told something but you had enough worries and I didn't want you to be worried about me. You will be the only person carrying about my problems. You couldn't see my pain because I was so good at hiding it I almost forgot I had it. I know you very well Lillian and you should not feel guilty, you didn't see it. Don't blame yourself for not seeing it. I also wanted to apologize for never stepping up when father hurts you. The last time I saw it was when you were being choked against the wall, you didn't see me. You were yelling for help but I wasn't there for you. I didn't think my father was capable of that, so I froze. I know I should have helped you but I was afraid myself. I am happy you are out of this house. Hopefully you're happy and Lorenzo takes good care of you, you deserve it.

You are enough and the best sister I could have asked for.

Ti amo

My eyes were welling up with tears, why didn't I notice? Was I that stupid or selfish?

I let the warm water stream over my body.

Letting my emotions go away with the water, then it happened, I broke down once again.

*a few days later*

I put on black trousers and a black turtleneck, all the black looked depressing but I couldn't show up at a funeral wearing pink.

The past days were a blur, I needed to plan the funeral and do homework. I tried to do as much as possible and keep myself busy with things so my mind wouldn't be distracted by sadness.

Today was a busy day. I had Zane's funeral and Maria's funeral. Lorenzo asked me to come to his mother's funeral and he was coming to my brother's funeral.

My mind was all over the place, it was the first time I would see my parents since I moved out and my brother died. I called my mom a few times but my dad, I am scared of what he is going to say, I think that's also the reason why Lorenzo is coming with me. He doesn't know who abused me but he has his suspicion on my father.

I looked in the mirror to see if everything was in place, I had to put on some more makeup than usual to fix the bags under my eyes because I didn't sleep much.

I grabbed my coat and bag before walking downstairs.

Lorenzo was in the living room calling with someone, I gave him a small knot before walking to the car.

After a few minutes he came, his face looked tense.
I gave him a small smile before we drove off.

The car ride was silent, I guess we both have things on our minds that we need to progress.

When we arrived at the church, there were a few people outside. I only invited close family.
I was searching for my parents but couldn't see them.

Lorenzo opened my door and walked with me. "If you need me just look for me. I will be close. Alright?"
I nodded.