I may not know what love is
But I know what it's not
It's not kisses for cookies
And handjobs in exchange
For changing the TV Channel
It's not
Hands in my dora the explorer underpants
In exchange for
10 minutes on the computer
It's not sitting in your lap
Letting you kiss on my neck
For the price of one
Chocolate covered strawberry
I may not know what love is
But I know it's not supposed to be
Chasing after you in a rainstorm
Because you said you would kill yourself
If ever I left you
It's not questioning if you're bisexual
Asking me to peg you
And cheating when I refuse
I may not know what love is
But I definitely know it's not
Items being thrown around the house
Being slammed against the wall by my neck
Having my phone taken away
Because you're accusing me of being unfaithful
Yet again
Following me to work
To see who I'm talking to
Spying on me and picking even more fights about what you saw out of context
I may not know what love is
But I know it's not being thrown out of your car
In the middle of winter
In nothing but a sweater
I know it's not you standing behind my car as I try to leave
And taking away my keys
And forcing me in your bed yet again
Because apparently that's all that I'm good for
I may not know what love is
But I know it's not supposed to be
The warmth of your hand on my body
And the cold metal of your wedding ring
You didn't bother removing
Because I was also married
After years of pursuing
You really only wanted one thing
From me
But you couldn't say that honestly
I may not know what love is
But I know it's not
Forcing me to participate
In the chaotic situation you created
The betrayal in your eyes
When they make me moan
Louder than you could
And I prove to you
I'm the fucking whore
They all said I would
Be and you pat me on the head
And you say I'm your girl now
And that you're proud of me
I may not know what love is
But I know it's not
Tears falling
Pulling at my hair
Glued to my phone
Willing for a text back
I know it's not
Falling asleep waiting for an answer
And waking up without one
I know it's not staring in the mirror
Asking why I'm not enough for you
And asking myself
When I'll get the courage
To put myself out of my misery
I may not know what love is
But I thank you for showing me
For wasting my time
And teaching me
What it's not supposed to be
YOU ARE READING
Identical Hearts
PoesíaThis is a collection of my poetry that I've written over the years. Stories of survival, love and loss, heartbreak and heartache. Keep reading they get better with time..
