de Santis (complete)

chapter six

ace de santis

noah's doctor smiles at us

"how has the dosage making you feel?"luke asks "good"noah says

"have you been helping him with his injections?" luke asks "sometimes but he usually does it on his own"i say

"you've been on testosterone for about two years now and since your body is adjusted and used to it, it's time to boost the dosage"luke says noah smiles and squeals

"your only wearing your binders for six to ten hours right?"luke asks "yeah"noah says "how long do you wear your binder everyday?"luke asks "uh i split it up"noah says "six hours cause of school then i take a break for two hours and put it back on until bed"my son says luke nods

"i know you workout, do you take your binder off when you workout?"luke asks "yeah i wear compression bras when i workout"noah says

noah started testosterone when he was 14, he cameout as transgender when he was 10 but he told me he'd known since he was 5

he's not getting surgeries until he's 18, 21 at the most that's my biggest rule. no surgies until he's a legal adult unless it's a something affecting his health

i think i've always known, he would cry when would i would put him in dresses or put his hair in pigtails

saint, my ex-wife noah's mom didn't take it well she misgendered noah and called him by his deadname and tried to do unspeakable things to him

an hour later

"do you want some?"i ask "is it alcholic?"noah asks

"yes but it doesn't have a lot"i say

"no thank you"noah says

"have you dranken recently?"i ask

"two years clean"noah says i high five him and kiss his head

saint used to heavily drink

"i do smoke sometimes"noah says "is that okay?"he asks "i dont want you vaping, you'll get metal in your lungs"i say noah nods "other than that i'm fine with it as long as your safe about it"i say

"does muna smoke with you?"i ask "no, jordan and i smoke together but i don't smoke that much it's not good to smoke on testosterone all the time"noah says i nod

"thank you for telling me"i say noah smiles

"can we make something?"noah asks "what do you want to make?"i ask "bomboloni's"noah says i nod

a few hours later

"so i'm getting taller"noah says "you are"i confirm "and my truck is to low for me when i get in it"noah continues "can i can get a wheel lift?"noah asks "yeah"i say "take the range rover tomorrow and i'll have one of the butlers take your car to the shop"i say noah nods

noah grabs one of the bomboloni's and fills it with chocolate "you don't want rasberry jam?"i fake gasp noah laughs "no it's gross"he says i gasp again and hold my chest "you pull my heart out of my chest"i say

"dad"noah says in a serious tone "what's up?"i ask "can i get a tattoo for you?"he asks "what do you mean?"i ask "i want a tattoo representing you"noah says "i-i want to have a tattoo to remind me you'll always be there for me"noah mumbles as he looks down "aw kiddo"i say as i hug my son "i-i know that it's hard to raise me and hard deal with me sometimes espically due to me being trans and having to take medications for my health, bu-but i want to do something for you becau-because your my dad and you've always been there for me even when i didn't want you there or-or expect you there"noah says