Locked In (Heart)

six

STAN'S POV

thursday, 8:00 a.m

approximately 39 hours until the annual lock-in.

each tick from the large clock on the wall was louder than whatever my teacher was teaching that day.

each tick meant less time than the tick i heard before.

time is kinda insane. it goes fast whenever you're having fun and enjoying yourself, however, when you're waiting anxiously on something or someone for that matter — it moves slower than cartman trying to run a lap around the track.

and speaking of the devil, that's who i'm waiting on now, a respond of a question i asked him via email on our laptop.

don't laugh, we don't have good signal in this classroom so whenever we want to talk shit we email.

kenny jokes about that once we get caught we'll have to resort to sending pigeons.

i got a notification and refreshed to see finally see his response.

ecar357@spisd.net: u want me to whatttttttt?

i sigh and begin typing again.

smar889@spisd.net: i want u to get information of hot topic face from clyde.

ecar357@spisd.net: u act like that's the easiest fcking thing to do.

smar889@spisd.net: bc everything is easy when you're a master manipulator...don't act like it's not. figure something out we don't have time!

ecar357@spisd.net: fcking FINE! why do you even want this so bad. i don't think kyle wants this anymore he seems like he wasn't in the mood today.

i stop for a bit after reading that and looked at kyle again and cartman's right.

ever since this morning, kyle has seemed a little out of it. not wanting to talk to me, or anyone for that matter.

i'm pretty sure it's because of this whole incident, which is why i'm sure he'll be fine after we get him an invite.

smar889@spisd.net: he'll b fine. just do what u have to do.

ecar357@spisd.net: shut up! ure making it seem like im sniping him!

i roll my eyes at that last email and close my laptop and attempt to pay attention to my teacher.

the bell finally rang after a few minutes with last reminders of assignments that are due this weekend which makes me cringe because i haven't started on any of them.

i push that to the side and try to approach kyle on the way out but he was already rushing to walk out which makes me a bit sad because we usually all walk to our next class period together.

"hey man wait up," i say laughing a bit to try to lift the mood, "you're racing to the next class like the entirety of the denver nuggets are in there."

he just kind of looks at me and says blatantly, "i don't feel good."

my eyes widen a bit at that comment, "like...do you need to go to the nurse or?"

he throws his bag over his shoulder after having everything packed and says, "no like i need to spend some time alone today."

my heart plummets at that comment, he's really not in the mood today.

it's also like he's hinting at me wrapping this conversation up so he can leave.

i'm a stubborn person though, whenever someone i care about is upset i want to know why and how i can help them!

so i don't give him what he wants, he's my best friend and i don't like to see him like this.

"kyle what's wrong," i come full force.

his face twitches in annoyance, "does anything have to be wrong for me to wish for time alone?"

"well you're a people person," i say, "especially when it comes to your friends...i mean, we always walk to 2nd period together. so of course i'm going to think something isn't right when you suddenly don't want to do it today."

he crosses his arms frustratedly, "i'm just telling you how it is and i'm just not wanting anyone's company today."

"that's bullshit and we both know it," i counter and look around to see basically the entire class watching, "can you guys like — leave?"

it was silent for a bit before craig says, "well this is a public place and you guys are creating drama, what do you expect?"

i roll my eyes and clutch my fist.

as much of a blunt asshole that he is, he's right.

i sigh and turn around to find kyle not where he stood, when i spun around again i caught him leaving the classroom.

i sigh again and grab my things running after him.

the hallways were crowded and we were all like packed sardines.

as chaotic as it was, i tried to spot a bright green trapper hat with red, curly hair peaking out from it.

after a few seconds, i found him heading towards the boys bathroom and i headed that same direction.

i was a little too excited to finally reach the place because i opened up the door which actually resulted in me slamming it open and everyone staring at me like the weirdo that i was.

i awkwardly stood there and waved to some familiar faces.

kyle was on the urinal looking annoyed as he peed, probably the most annoying pee of his life.

one after the other left restroom and he was just me and kyle.

and the urinals.

and the toilets.

and the graffiti on the walls.

he just looks at me, "you won't leave me alone will you?"

"chasing you down into the bathroom when i don't have to should answer that," i say.

his frown twitches into a small smile at that but he fixes his composure a bit.

"i'm really....fine stan. i'm just not feeling it today. and it has nothing to do with the lock in results like i don't care about that anymore. you know i'm a sensitive person, so i'm just...feeling sensitive right now," kyle confesses.

i digest that for a moment, "'sensitive' can mean either good or bad....i hope it's not in a terrible way. i just don't want you to feel like that."

his eyes widen and he quickly looks towards the round, "it's just who i am. id truly appreciate it if you respected that please. i just want to be on my own, in my own thoughts...just for today."

as much as i wanted to counter, i had to back down.

he is my best friend and i care about him, and i know he has his own battles he has to fight.

i just feel like he internalizes so much shit beyond what he tells me and doesn't have an outlet to say it to.

as superficial as it sounds, sometimes i wish he'd have a girlfriend or someone special to vent to...if he doesn't want to vent to me or anyone else.

i just sigh and nod my head, "text me later though, okay? i'm still gonna get you in no matter what!"

kyle just stood there and nodded, not saying a word.

and to me, that's full permission to go full on.

so let's do this.

AUTHOR'S NOTE:

hello!!!

sorry for the long wait of an update, a really busy few weeks but we're back to our regular schedule!

this chapter features stoopid, naive stan who is at a loss for kyle.

pls brace yourselves for more of this

— brooke