It's Billy's Favorite

Chapter V

   | Chapter contains severe drinking, trauma, verbal abuse, and mental abuse. Viewer discretion is advised to those sensitive of the topics listed. It's not my intention to trigger anyone in anyway. Which is why I make these warnings ahead of time. All love :) |

          By the next month I was shocked that Jane wasn't expelled, but I guess it's difficult to expel someone who is five. She and that kid Mickey always got into some type of brawl at least once a week. I have a feeling she is the reason his family moved to Tampa. I mean I don't feel bad because they did treat my family like we were peasants. They had enough money to buy million dollar mansions and would occasionally come by and insult us for barely having enough to fix the steps on the front porch, my mother didn't like that comment. Some good did occur during that month; my mother got a job as a bartender and waitress and I got a job delivering newspapers to the neighborhood. It wasn't much but it was enough to get by. I tried to tell my grandmother we didn't need the money anymore but she suggested I save the money in case of emergencies. I did just that and created a secret fund of my grandmother's money. Every time we received her deposit I put it in a huge box and hid it in the attic. I also hid portions of the money in the backyard behind rose bushes. My mother never found out about the money we had and I how I was saving every penny.
"So you're telling me we can't steal anymore stuff?" Jane asked. "Shhh. We are in a grocery store. And no we don't need to anymore." "But it was fun." "Jane we only did it because we didn't have anything. Now we're slowly getting back up on our feet." "But we're still behind the poverty line." "Jesus. Can't you just calm down and not say shit like that in public." "Why? So you can say that shit?" "Don't say that word!" "What word? Shit?" "Jane Victoria Goldmann!" "Robert William Goldmann?"
Jane always annoyed me at least once every day. It's not that I didn't love her but sometimes she was a lot to deal with.
"I want to watch MTV move!" Jane barked. "I'm the oldest and I'm watching Soul Train. Back off." "Why is you being older make you have control over the tv?" "Well I'm in charge when mom isn't here and sometimes when she is here. Just sit down and wait your turn." "Not a chance."
She grabbed the remote and switched to mtv before throwing the remote outside.
"What the fuck?!" "Go find it. I'm watching MTV."
Alright she tended to annoy me more than once a day but I still loved her.

_________

   Unfortunately these months of bliss activity never lingered as long as I wished it would. Yes my mother was finally making money, but there were a few times she wouldn't be home for days. I was always worried something happened to her but I was too scared to leave my sister with Billy all by herself. One day I did have to find my mother because it was a week where I didn't see her. I left when Billy and Jane were asleep and left the house roaming through the town trying to find her. I eventually found her at her job after closing. She was drunk and dancing with her boss while people were passed out on the ground.
  "Hey kid! You ain't supposed to be in here. Not unless you got an ID." "I'm eleven." "That's what I thought I'm gonna need you to leave now." "My mother is right there I need her to come home."
  The guard turned around and chuckled when he looked at her.
   "You mean Candy?" "What?" "Yeah the chick with the red hair?" "Yeah that's my mom." "Yeah she's been with the owner all week. She's been working and dancing with him the whole time. I think she's going through some stuff because that girl knows how to chug beers." "Well I need her to come back right now." "Well you can't go inside." "Then can you go grab her?" "No can do man. I'm working." "Dude seriously?" "Yeah. I get off at three. If she's still here I'll let her know you stopped by." "I'm not leaving here without her." "Well then I guess your ass is standing outside because you can't come in."
  He slammed the door in my face and I sat down on the steps.
"Fuck."
A few hours later she was still inside the bar hammered. I didn't know what to do so I just went home. I couldn't help her and I decided to not leave my sister alone anymore. Whatever happened to my mother that night was in her hands, not mine. Not anymore. She didn't end up coming back until the next week. She stumbled into the house at one in the morning drunk.
"Hi Robbie. Why aren't you in bed?" "I was working on school work." "Well that's good. Sorry I'm home late. I was working a few extra hours." "You mean like a full two weeks worth of extra shifts?" "What?" "You haven't been home for two weeks." "Oh well I knew you would be ok. Jane and Billy would be alright because they have you." "So if that's the case why did you come back home?" "One, tomorrow is Billy's birthday and I need to get him his favorite food." "What?" "Are you fucking kidding me? Apple pie is your brother's favorite food. I have to make it for him bright in early so he wakes up smelling warm buttery apples." "How about coming home to take care of your kids?" "Don't you dare look down at me as a mother. I do the best I can and I will make sure that Billy has a great day. Don't make me feel like I did something wrong. Now go get me things from the grocery store, take Jane leave Billy with me. I want it to be a surprise." "He's gonna be three ma I don't think he's gonna notice." "Well every year I make him apple pie for his birthday and he always smiles. Now get the fucking shit at the store and be back before the sunset. You understand?" "Yep whatever." "What did you say?" "Nothing where is the list?" "No."
  She grabbed my shoulder and flipped me around with her hands on her hips.
  "You don't give me attitude." "Sure Candy." "What did you just say?" "The fucking security told me your name was Candy. What the fuck is that about?" "You went to the bar?" "I wasn't drinking but you sure as hell was." "I was working." "Yeah with your boss." "Hey! You do not get to tell me what to do with my life! Jimmy is a friend." "He's also your boss." "So?" "Are you gonna spend more time with him?" "That is none of your business. Don't ever come to my work again. Take your sister and get this shit for me. I'm afraid if I'm around you for five more minutes I might send you to the hospital."
  She slammed her bedroom door and Jane came out of her room already dressed.
  "Ready to go?" She asked. "Sure. Let's go."