The Changes In Our Moments

•chapter 28•

I open my eyes.
I am surrounded by a road.
The cliff where I died.
Then I see her, my mother.
"am, am I dead?" I question my mother.
She touches my cheek, "It's great to see you again."
she smiles tightly.
"mom?! am. I. dead?" I question her harsher.
"oh honey, it's okay. you deserve this now."
she stares at me.
"I don't want to die! I'm not ready!"
she shakes her head, "honey you have killed people. you are lucky they let you here. you deserve to die sweetie."
she looks at me, "when you kill people you become a monster. it's your time."
I cry, "but mommy! I don't want to die! I don't want to be a monster."
she wipes away my tears with her fingers then grabs my hands, "honey! you got what you deserved, you died. you need to stay dead. you got what you deserved. it's how it works." she smiles a reassuring smile.
I sob and struggle to keep my lip up right, "mommy, do you hate me?" I cry really hard
"of course not, you just died, and when you die, it's supposed to stay that way.
I cry and nod.
"then how do I make it stay that way?" I ask her.
"I have someone for you to meet." she smiles her red lips blooming like a rose for the first time in spring.
she opens a bright door leading to a large room. the large room is a church.
I walk in. my mom follows me, and brings me to a large and bright shiny man.
"hello my dear Bree." he smiles as he turns around, "
I am God." he smiles
"and you have found your home, you Bree have entered heaven."
I nod my head, "how do I see it completely?" I question him.
"you must pass through me. but of course you must make a decision."
I squint my eye brows, then he continues.
"are you ready to die?" he asks me.
I open my mouth then he holds up a finger and interrupts me, "you have 5 hours to figure out your answer."
I nod as he disappears and I am in the room alone, "mom?!" I shout.
"if you count me as a girl, and also the person who gave birth to you then sure why not?" a familiar voice says.
I turn around to see someone very familiar.
I run into Camden's arms and hug him.
"Camden! oh my gosh! I'm so happy to see you!" I say with my smile brightened to my cheeks.
then I drop it and pull away, "wait if I see you that means, you- you are- you're-" he cuts me
off, "I am dead Bree. it's gonna stay that way." he clears his throat.
I cry- "no, no!" I pull my head back. terrified
"no!!! no!" I fall to my knees sobbing, "you can't be dead!"
he kneels down next to me, " I am. I will stay this way. I am happy. I am very happy. I can still see all of you, and the girl I love too!" he blushes, "And I will see all of you again, I love it here." I smile, "how come I don't experience it?" he shakes his head, "because you have a decision to make." he smiles. "I would go back in a heart beat. Bree you deserve to finish life. to experience it. to live it and love it." I nod.
"but I killed people and died. i don't deserve this." he shakes his head at my latest words.
"no. you have an actual life for you to experience. and then you get this in the end." he laughs, "the answer should be easy."
I nod.
"I'm gonna live."
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After 4 hours pass, and my fifth is almost up I start saying my goodbyes to Camden.
"I have to go." I try to smile.
"I know." he says taking a deep breath.
"I will see you soon then?" he says
"I will see you soon then." I smile and hug him.
"thank you for being my best friend." I say.
"couldn't have said it better." he laughs.
"I grab his hand, thank you for bumping into me that one day. I love you Camden. not only could I tell you anything but you were always the person that knew me and my feelings better than anyone. You were always there for me and you could tell me anything and help me. that's a true friend."
"it was a pleasure being your friend." he hugs me and grabs my hands into his.
"please tell Giavanna I love her, and I miss her but I'll see her soon and I'm not her angel, she is mine." he smiles.
I nod, "I will!"
He grins, "make your life something special. I'll see you soon then?"
I nod, "I'll see you soon then Camden."
I let go of his hands and walk away.
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I find my mother.
"I can't stay here! not yet, I have a life to live. I made a mistake that's what life is about. but I have a life to live, one I never actually got mom!" she nods.
"so what's stopping you?" she asks me.
"I just needed to say goodbye." I huff.
she shakes her head, "this isn't goodbye. I'll always be here. right beside you." she smiles so bright, "I love you." I cry, " I love you too mama."
I walk backwards then turn around as I wave a goodbye and look at God, "I want to live."
he smiles, "that's wonderful. live you shall my child. live you shall."