Head in the clouds

Twelve- Theo

"Okay," Morgan's hand danced outside the window, the summer breeze hitting her skin as we drove down the coast. Neither of us had any clue where we were going but we just wanted to drive. She'd been quiet since I distracted her and paid for her ice cream when she looked away. I had to. I needed to buy her something today and if ice cream was my only way in, I sure as hell was going to take every chance I could. I thought buying her dinner would be a step too far and I could put off the ice cream thing as pay back for losing her pen which was sitting quietly in my pocket. "Would you rather go a month without your phone or forever without dessert?"

We'd been playing this game all afternoon. I think it was keeping her mind occupied because she'd go quiet and then randomly ask a question. Her over thinking face looked exactly like Sarah's and I hated it. I'd heard the things Sarah over thought and she was still in high school. There wasn't as much pressure on her as Morgan had. I can only imagine the extra stuff she's got too and judging by how often it keeps hitting her and how quickly she is to try and distract herself, I had no doubt it was a common occurrence. She had to hide that something was wrong and I think I hated that more than anything.

Also, the whole Grammy performance thing was playing on my mind. I'd watched clips of Morgan being in the moment. On stage, looking around at the crowd with her hand on her heart. I could tell the stage was where she felt at home. That moments like that came often to her whilst it was settling in. I don't think being in the moment of just being at the Grammy's had anything to do with her turning it down. The complete shock she was in when she won made me think she didn't believe she was good enough to be there at all and her actions today, the protectiveness of me reading her book, the way every time it gets brought up she jumps the topic. She doesn't think she deserves any of this. I'm guessing her friends fight her on this judging by her not telling them about the performance so at least someone's telling her she does.

"Without my phone, no questions asked."

"Really?"

"Hell yes. I have the biggest sweet tooth and I'm guessing anything that could be classed as dessert gets included in that, at any time of day and I just can't imagine the rest of my life without ice cream, or waffles, or fuck, no cheesecake. Nope. Take my phone now." She giggled. "What about you? Phone or dessert?"

"I guess phone too. Though not because I'm obsessed with cheesecake but because when I can eventually get up there, I need to have a sundae from this ice cream bar at our local beach."

"That's a valid point. If you're not obsessed with cheesecake what is your obsession?"

"Pasta."

"Pasta?"

"I am the biggest pasta whore on the planet. I could eat it until it's coming out of my ears and it still wouldn't be enough. That or a proper Sunday roast."

"What's your preferred pasta shape then?"

"That is an insulting question. All pasta is beautiful." I looked over at her quickly as she turned in her seat, smile bright across her face. "If you held a gun to my head I'd have to say Fusilli."

"The swirly one? I was expecting Penne or something."

"See, Penne is great but it doesn't hold sauce as well as Fusilli does. The curls just grasp it perfectly." I never thought I'd be driving down a coastal highway with the most beautiful girl I've ever seen, telling me why one pasta shape is better than the other but I honestly did not want to be anywhere else. Ever. Just here with the sun glowing against her skin, hair blowing crazy out the open window, that smile. God, the things I'd do for that smile. "You're go. What are you tired of hearing about?"

"My ex." My words fell out of my mouth before I could stop them and I instantly regretted this getting too deep. It was supposed to be fun, light hearted. If I'd thought a little harder, I'd have found something in the news. Anything. Anything but bringing her up. Not right now.

"Yeah, I bet that sucks." She nodded slowly. "Like why do they always refer to you as her ex? It's weird. I had no clue who she was until she started hanging around with you and now she's all big and famous, no doubt because of being linked to you and somehow that's what you're known for? Like you didn't have a name for yourself before her?"

"Exactly! Thing is, we didn't exactly end great either so it's like such a shit thing to be reminded of every single time I make an achievement, it's always something like 'the artist who ended his relationship with Veronica 3 months ago'."

"What happened? If you don't mind me asking obviously. I know it's none of my business." I sighed, running a hand through my hair and holding onto the car door with my arm out the window. If I ever wanted to potentially be in this line of guys for her, she'd deserve to know. Hell, I want to know what made her think dating is too complicated.

"I walked into my house one day and found her in bed with 2 of my friends."

"2 OF THEM?"

"Yep. One on either end." Her hand covered her open mouth. "Disgusting, I know."

"What a slag." Only Morgan would openly call a model turned Oscar nominated actress a slag. "Like come on, at least get your boyfriend involved in your fantasies man. Do your thing but don't cheat to do it. End it or have a 3 some with your partner if that's what you want, I'm not going to judge but you know. Just have some respect." It wasn't even the 3 something grossing her out? Jesus. No. Stop Theo. Not again. You are not getting hard over her again. We sorted this problem this morning that damn picture of her in those jeans. Fuck.

"My point exactly." Change the topic Theo. "Would you rather go a year into the future or a year into the past to talk to yourself for 20 minutes?"