fyozai headcannons 2

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Dazai can get drunk easily with wine because he hasn't built up a tolerance for it yet

Fyodor hates smoking since well it ruins your lungs n shit but he can tolerate when Dazai does it since he likes him that much, risking his lungs n ssshhsiii

Dazai hates when Fyodor recites a bible verse at him and whines all day when Fyodor doesnt stop and he never stops

They both like apple pies because of Shibusawa

Fyodor has like 4-8 pet rats and Dazai thinks theyre all cute except for one, its a black rat with like only one eye who loves Fyodor way too much

Dazai has a cat and Fyodor detests it and the cat in return does not like him back and keeps hissing at Fyo, Dazai js giggles whenever he sees them glare at eachfoher

Dazai sometimes lets his cat loose to chase Fyodor's black rat just because he wants to see the rat suffer a lil and Fyodor gives him and his cat a scolding whenever he does it and pampers his rat after which Dazai sulks over

Theyre both VERYYY affectionate then just want to kill eachother like they could be saying the most sweetest diabetic words and sentences to eachother then their words turn so vile and murderous then they pull a gun or knife at eachother then laugh it off the next moment

Fyodor doesnt like that Dazai flirts with other women into commiting double suicide with him but doesnt voice his concern and Dazai knows but keeps flirting anyways js to annoy Fyodor

Theyre both like the lovers that show their affection through actions n shit like Dazai would give Fyodor a dead bird as a present to show that he loves him and Fyodor would give Dazai a severed hand with a ring on it as a proposal thing shit idfk (like that one chucky movie idk i forgot😭)

ok yeah thats all i got

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