Mended

38

Elijah's POV

Olivia's hand was strong around mine as she led me upstairs and into our bedroom. In the distance, I heard Noelle chattering away to Kaiden as he carried her into her playroom.

"Come sit with me," Olivia said softly, pulling me towards the edge of the bed.

She took a seat next to me as I leaned forward and placed my head in my hands, briefly closing my eyes. I felt her gaze piercing into the side of my face as she silently studied me, her hand resting on my leg.

"Why do you smell like perfume?" She asked, no doubt in her voice but simple curiosity. Her trust in me was sometimes more than I felt I deserved.

"There was a woman," I explained quietly, glancing over at her. "But I didn't do anything."

Her lips twitched. "Can't leave you alone anywhere, can I?" She sighed, rolling her eyes. Her tone was light though, so I knew she wasn't taking anything to heart, but I still had to say it.

"I'd never do that to you, you know that, right?" I murmured and Olivia's smile faded, her forest green gaze turning soft.

She squeezed my hand. "I know."

There was enough conviction in her voice that I let it go. Exhaling deeply, I looked away and felt her inch closer, her arm wrapping around my neck as she pressed against my side. I closed my eyes as she pressed her forehead against the side of mine, her lashes fluttering against my skin as she breathed me in.

"I can feel your guilt, Elijah," she whispered, brushing her thumb across the tattoo wrapped around the side of my neck. "You have to know that you did nothing wrong."

My throat constricted, words failing me. Olivia pressed her lips against my shoulder, letting them linger before she spoke again.

"Talk to me," she said.

"I don't know what to say," I admitted, releasing a shaky breath. "He just—all this time..." I couldn't finish, but thankfully, I didn't need to because she understood what I was trying to say anyways.

"He didn't want to hurt you," she murmured, the sadness in her voice audible. "I think that's why he didn't tell you. Maybe I wouldn't have understood before but now having Elle, it makes sense that he wanted to keep quiet about it. Anything to avoid giving you pain."

"He hurt me anyways," I choked out, turning to meet her gaze. Olivia scanned my face, the empathy visible in her expression almost too much to bear. "Letting me believe that he did that shit to Mom—you think that didn't hurt? Seeing them drift apart? Forcing me to be in the middle of everything? Forcing me to keep it all a secret from my siblings?"

Olivia's gaze glistened. "Elijah—"

"Do you know— " I paused, swallowing hard. "Do you know how much could've been avoided if he'd just told me?"

The reality of it was devastating.

"Ethan wouldn't be suffering the way he always is," I rasped. "I'd have kept Elena away from us from the start if I'd known, so Caleb wouldn't have been hurt the way he was when he found out she's his mother. Sophia—fuck," My voice broke. Olivia pressed closer to me. "I let Sophia live with her, Livia. I—I let my little sister live with someone who— "

"You didn't know," Olivia whispered, but I barely heard her.

"And Izzy—" My chest tightened as nausea rushed through me. "Fuck."

She was still in therapy. Years later, she was still in fucking therapy.

"I almost lost her," I still couldn't breathe when I thought about what had almost happened.