Saving Hope - Clouis/Louisentine fanfiction - Hope Sequel.

Chapter 9 - Lost and found

Aasim's POV

"No...No no no. I can't- shit." I muttered to myself, covering my ears and tapping my foot. This is my fault. This is my fucking fault. All I need to do is get up and see her. But no I'm sat like a stupid Billy no mates counting the stains on the white tile wall. I counted 7 overall, pretty sure half of those are blood. 

"Come on Aasim get a hold of yourself," I growled to myself again, punching my knee as I quickly rose to my feet. Deep breaths Aasim, Don't cry. I'm trying so hard not to cry, but my throat feels clenched, my lips are wobbling and my hands won't stop fucking shaking. I feel like my legs are about to give out and that my heart is gonna burst out of my chest. 

I started shuffling across the grimy white hall, itching my arms and wiping my sweaty head with my trembling arms, I got to the corner and made a left. Third door down. I passed 2 sets of white wooden doors, the ones with narrow vertical windows next to the handle. And then finally, I got to the room that Elenor girl told me about. 103. The numbers were in black just above the door, the 3 was missing a chip around the top curve.

I took a deep cleansing breath and finally mustered up the courage to open the door. I opened it as silently as I could, letting out a tiny creak. I was really starting to dread what I was about to see, it couldn't be as bad as I was thinking. Right?...

I stepped in and slowly closed the door behind me, unable to stop the little click. My eyes immediately clocked onto the bed. I felt myself sigh as I stood forward, closer to her. 

There she lay, pale and still. She was wrapped up in a ridiculously thin blanket. Her ginger curls stuck to her face, dark bags under her eyes. She looked so weak, so small, so exhausted...yet I'd never been so happy to see her. She's still the most beautiful woman I've ever laid my eyes on. And I can't believe I caused that gorgeous face so much pain. I looked at her, her blue eyes once full of life, emotion, and kindness.  Which were now emotionless and grey, a storm had replaced the calm sea that once was. But she wouldn't look back, her empty eyes just stared off into the distance.

I took a gulp, swallowing away the paranoia that was wrapping around my brain like barbed wire.

"Hey, Rubydubes...it's me...Aasim." My voice wobbled as my hand went to her head, tucking her ginger curls behind her pale, freckly face. She tensed up and her mouth began to wobble, but she still refused to look at me. I sighed and reached out for her palm, interlocking my fingers with hers...but she didn't do it back.

"Look, Ruby... I didn't mean-"

She suddenly slapped my hand away, causing me to flinch and rub it. She threw her blanket and stormed out of bed. Walking away from me on her unsteady feet.

"Ruby no! You need to lie do-"

"DON'T PRETEND LIKE YOU GAVE A SHIT AASIM! YOU DIDN'T WANT A BABY!" She started yelling as she leaned up into my face. Her face began to go red and her eyes turned into daggers. Stabbing into my chest.

"Ruby, you should probably sit down..." I mumbled nervously as I twiddled my thumbs. But her face dropped and she just shot me a stern mum look. The kind my mum would give me when I fucked up badly.

"O-Or stand t-that's cool too." I stuttered in a jittery manner. Taking a deep breath so I don't have a fucking mental breakdown. I need to be there for her.