Loki Laufeyson Oneshots Vol.2

Come Back To Me

(Y/N)= your name
(E/C)= eye colour
(H/C)= hair colour
(F/C)= favourite colour
(S/C)= skin colour

TW: schizophrenia, I'm not strongly educated on this topic so I do apologise if things are unrealistic, I went off of information from the person who requested this and the NHS website. This was an anonymous request (:

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Everybody complains about having a bad day at work or forcing themselves to leave the comfy confines of their bed and make the dreadful journey to the job that they absolutely loathe, however I don't think anything can be more stress and anxiety inducing than saving lives for a living. Preventing androids, aliens and wizards from taking over the world was beyond exhausting - mentally and physically. Yet, I wouldn't change my career for the world, it united me with the family I have today.

My job as an Avenger is also the sole reason as to why I am currently in a healthy, two year long relationship with the infamous God of Mischief - Loki Laufeyson. He didn't join too long after I did, something about repenting for the utter destruction and havoc he inflicted upon New York in 2012, the team gave him tons of crap for the first few months until eventually a meeting was called which provided evidence that Loki was indeed under mind control of the Mad Titan. Ever since then, everyone visibly relaxed around Loki and began treating him as part of our family of misfits.

He had always fascinated me from the moment my eyes caught sight of him and Thor walking out of the elevator, it seemed as though I piqued his interest as he did mine since our eyes immediately locked. That perfectly mischievous smirk he always wore made me swoon, his deep, sensual voice rattled my nerves, those emerald eyes never fail to make a smile tug at the corners of my lips. He's perfect in every way a person can be perfect, the exhilarating sensation that racked my body when we shared our first kiss was nothing less than euphoric, you can compare it to finally finding the last jigsaw piece that had been missing for months.

Loki completed that void in my heart and I thawed his frozen one, he makes me feel whole, loved; respected. So you can imagine how much anxiety overrode my head every single day for 3 months until I finally found the guts to tell Loki about my schizophrenia, the devil flaunting about in my head told me he'd leave, he'd turn away and never look back; he'd spit at me with disgust and call me every profanity under the sun. 

I remember that night crystal clear, it will forever be engraved in my memories until the day I die - that's when I knew that I would be spending the rest of my life with this man. He held me as I cried, he whispered reassurance after reassurance that my schizophrenia didn't define me and that he was here to stay for as long as I allowed him to. The sheer amount of love and compassion that was shared that evening will always be cherished, to this day, the memory still makes the butterflies twirl and flutter in my tummy and a faint heat rise to my cheeks.

I'll never take his love, his patience nor his care for granted. Now whenever I have an episode, Loki is always there to pull me out of them and comfort me until I'm back with him. He never rolls his eyes and walks away or lets me deal with them on my own, he verbally and visibly expresses that he's here for me, I'm not alone and that everything is going to be completely okay. 

But that's not to say that things don't get tough for me, especially when the stress and anxiety that comes with being an Avenger combines with dealing with schizophrenia and becomes too much. My head becomes fuzzy and noises around me become faint and hazy, I'll begin to feel a sudden wave of emotions that I can't run away from, faces become blurry, sometimes I'll feel as though I'm not the one controlling my body and it only escalates the situation. I hate it with every fibre of my being, it makes me feel like I'm the black sheep in society, like I'm disassociated from everyone else.