Let Her Go (Already Broken Sequel) {J.B.}

chapter eighteen

     "Good morning." Justin stands in my doorway, grocery bags hanging from his hands. 'Thank You For Shopping At Greg's Grocery' is stamped on each bag, the market just off campus. He's covered in a dark hood and bulky sunglasses, and if it weren't for the sarcastic grin, I'd probably not even recognize him. "It's me," he says, as if I were clueless.

     "Groceries?" I question. I lean my body against the side of the door, allowing him inside.

     "Yup." He settles the bags on the counter top, then helps himself to the cabinets where he shuffles around until he finds a couple of frying pans. "You said you didn't have any food, so I got some." He fidgets with the stove knobs until two gas burners turn on, then empties out the bags onto the counter.

     He fills my pantries and fridge with the food he bought, and I watch him as pushes things in my cabinet aside, making room for his new contributions. He hums under his breath as he does so, then picks up a carton of eggs in the back of my refrigerator, checking the bottom for an expiration date, probably. I assume they were past their prime, as they get tossed in the trash seconds later.

     The new carton of eggs he picked up from the market are the ones that get cracked in a bowl.

     "You like orange juice," he says. I think it's a question, so I nod my head, but he doesn't wait for an answer before pouring me a glass.

     "Thank you," I mumble.

     "Oh and, um-" Justin reaches into his pocket and shakes a bottle labeled 'Prenatal Multivitamins' in front of me.

      A smile creeps up on my face. I look up to thank him, but he's already turned back around, buttering a piece of toast.

     "Really Justin, you didn't have to do this."

     "How do you like your eggs cooked?"

     I don't answer, and he whips around, his eyes widened at mine.

     "Scrambled," I sigh, a sheepish smile forming on my lips.

     A few moments later, Justin places two plates in front of me, one with eggs, spinach and toast, the other covered with fresh cut fruit. He stuffs a piece of my toast in his mouth, then begins wiping dishes clean with a rag he must have dug through multiple drawers to find.

     I twirl my fork around my plate, taking bites intermittently.

     "Is it okay?" Justin asks, taking a sip of my orange juice.

     I stuff my hands in my lap and look up to meet his eyes. He clears his throat and places the glass of orange juice back in front of me, wiping his bottom lip that's turned up in a shy smile.

     "Sorry," he murmurs.

     "No," I apologize, "I'm sorry, I- this was so nice of you."

     He conceals a small laugh with another smile, then whisps his thumb across his mouth. "Too much?"

     I shake my head. "No- I mean, it shouldn't be. I want you to like, be here. It's just kind of surreal I guess. That I'm pregnant. And we're having a baby, and you're making me breakfast and bringing me vitamins."

     He tenses and backs up just slightly.

     I run my hand over my face, frustrated at my inability to ever convey what I actually mean. "I'm sorry, I want you here, and I want you to keep doing things like this." I reach toward him and grab his arm, pulling him back to where he stood before. "I'm just getting used to everything that's new and different. But I want you here, really."