Lies & Harmony Trilogy

Chapter Nine: Harmony

The pills are the first thing I see.

     When I opened the door, I never expected to see them. In fact, I thought I would never see them ever again. Black pills instead of white ones sit on the made bed. I stare at the clear bottle, wondering if this is all real. The book I hold clatters onto the ground.

     I take a step in and shut the door behind me, my eyes fixed on the pills. My mouth waters, and I take another step forward.

     I pause, steadying myself against a wall and shut my eyes. Do I really want them?

     There is no choice. Dropping all pretense of self-control, I run over to the pills and struggle to open the white cap. It twists off with a loud pop! I am about to pour the pills down my throat, but I stop myself. How many pills I’m supposed to take, I’m not sure. The nurses and doctors always controlled the doses. I hesitate, on the verge of throwing my head back and swallowing all of the pills.

     It is dangerous. I can’t do that. I will be at risk to some life-threatening condition. If the hospital ever finds out that I have taken more pills than I should take when not monitored by a nurse, I will be punished. I don’t like being culpable.

     There is no label on the lid, but I know these pills are from the hospital. It’s the Special Pills: oval shaped black pills with little white dots at the ends. I can recognize pills from the hospital at any distance. We learned about all of them a long time ago in class and memorized them. But our Teacher never told us what the Special Pills did.

     I am hesitant, but I end up shoving one pill in my mouth. The pill is from the hospital. I don’t have to worry about any bad outcomes. The pills in the hospital are good. If the hospital truly is bad, the pills are the only things that feel right.

     I know they shouldn’t, but they do.

     Nothing happens for a moment, and I begin to feel panic. What if the Special Pills are dangerous? I don’t even know what they do. But then I am suddenly sluggish, and my vision is blurry. Closing my eyes, I lower myself onto the soft comforter. I am tired. I will sleep. Yes, sleep sounds like a good choice.

     Then I wonder; why would there be hospital pills on the ship?

     My eyes open slowly, and I struggle to get up. My arms and legs don’t respond to me. The pills tell me to sleep. My mind refuses.

     But the rebellion doesn’t last long, and I fall into deep darkness.

Mr. Lizard is watching me.

     “Pathetic child,” he says. “You and your pathetic goals and your pathetic life.”

     Tears prickle at the corner of my eyes, and I wipe them away, keeping my eyes fixed on the ground. Mud cakes the edges of my yellow flats, but it doesn’t bother me. The sight of my dirty shoes feels more comforting than Mr. Lizard’s face.

     “Are you listening to me?” Mr. Lizard hisses, his voice raspy and sibilant. The sound of it makes me shiver, and I bunch my hands into fist, clenching the rough material of my dress. “I said are you listening to me?” His voice rises in anger, and I shrink back. I need to respond before he gets angrier.

     “Yes,” I say meekly, the ground growing blurry. More tears press against my eyes.

     “Then look at me, Hope.” He says my name with a sneer, like it is some kind of ironic joke.

     Slowly, I raise my head, trying not to wince. He is normal from neck down. Impeccable black shoes rest on the dirt, and he wears white pants and a button-down shirt. When my eyes reach his pale neck, I hesitate. A low growl emits from his throat and my head jerks up sharply so my eyes meet his face. I force myself not to scream. Biting my tongue to keep from making any noises, I stare at his face.