The Great War.

XVII

"The Melody of Weary Souls."

The effects of sleep deprivation show up in various ways throughout my body: I feel dizzy most of the time; my thoughts are all over the place, and I easily lose my sense of direction in the woods. The worst part is that I feel cold all the time; I'm freezing from head to toe. Whenever we take a break after hours of trekking, sleep eludes me completely. I have too many things on my mind, and closing my eyes feels like a deadly trap at this point. I mix a couple of painkillers, hoping they will make me feel better, but they seem to have no effect.

Despite Cato's insistence that I rest while he stands guard, my weariness is overshadowed by an overwhelming sense of distrust. Even though we are planning a strategy to hunt down the girl from District 12, I feel like he will try to kill me when I least expect it. My head feels like it's about to explode, my eyes burn, and my thoughts remain clouded. I'm aware that eventually my body will succumb to exhaustion, but I try to hold on a little longer even though coherent thinking slips through my grasp like a fleeting shadow.

We haven't made much progress with our plan to catch the girl from District 12, perhaps because both of us are muddled by lack of sleep. However, things have gotten complicated now that we know she's armed. We can't get too close because her arrows can reach us from a distance. We need to take her by surprise, but to do that, we must find her first. Cato has suggested that we try to eliminate the other tributes in the meantime, relying on the Gamemakers to guide us towards her eventually.

After a few hours, hunger starts to kick in. I only have a couple of nutrition bars left, and I doubt they'll last long. Since Marvel, the only skilled hunter among us, is now dead, finding food seems almost impossible. Neither Cato nor I know how to hunt; I catch myself thinking that it would've been better if my district partner had died instead of Marvel. But if I ever dared to say that out loud, they'd execute me for treason in my district.

I try not to dwell on these thoughts because it's pointless, and I can't afford to get stuck in my mind at this stage of the Games. Cato doesn't talk much, and neither do I. We walk through the woods in silence, but I'm sure that we both know, deep down, that all of this is in vain. Night falls without haste, and we stop in a clearing to rest once again.

I throw myself onto the ground, lying on my back with my gaze fixed on the sky. The wind creates a beautiful melody as it dances across the treetops. I'm somehow relaxed but I can't breathe properly, and I have a list of possible causes as my body deteriorates, but instead of seeking blame, I try to calm myself down and find a tinny glimmer of peace, even if only for a couple of minutes. I hear Cato walking around the clearing, the leaves crunching under his feet, and that sound blends with the song of the forest; I've lost the energy to keep my guard up. He can kill me if he wants to because I'm way too exhausted to put up a fight right now.

I'm gradually losing consciousness. I can't battle the exhaustion, the cold, or the world around me anymore. I could die from hypothermia, but there are hundreds of other things that could kill me right now as well. I close my jacket up to my neck and curl up to stay warm. I think about ending it all once and for all, killing Cato while he sleeps now that he still trusts me and our alliance. But I'm way too tired to do it. I can't even manage to stand up; maybe tomorrow.

Just as I finally feel like I'll be able to sleep after several days, I'm abruptly jolted awake by the blaring sound of trumpets. Usually, the only information we receive as tributes is the daily death count. However, occasionally the trumpets signal an announcement. The most common announcement is an invitation to a feast, especially when food is scarce. The feast takes place at a known location, often the Cornucopia, and is intended for all the tributes. So I rise to my feet, eagerly anticipating the significant news. We are in desperate need of food and must eliminate our competition. I won't hesitate to kill for a good meal because it's the first time in my life that I'm experiencing hunger. My stomach hurts, and nothing in my backpack can relieve my suffering. My body has started rejecting the nutrition bars as they give me acid reflux minutes after consuming them.