QSMP Short Stories

She Never Was a Fighter | Tallulah Angst to Fluff

TW: E.D., depression, S.H., angst! (IRL AU)

       "Mi niña, why aren't you eating?" the room went silent, all looking over at the brunette girl who poked around at her food with a salad fork. She bit her lip, "I'm not hungry...." Chayanne and Phil looked at each other with a frown, knowing how Tallulah had been acting recently. "Are you sick my petal? You haven't eaten all day, and you look mighty pale and tired," her dad said with concern as she stared out the window. "Yeah, probably," she agreed, wishing for them to leave her alone more than anything. She just wanted to lie in bed as hunger ate her alive, it was ironic, really. The purple dragon hybrid wanted to look out her window and wish for things to simply become easier, for depression to disappear, and to simply be happy again. But you can't simply wish for something and expect it to happen; this wasn't a fairy tale.

      "May I be excused Papi?" The girl mumbled, looking at her plate of spaghetti and salad, she hadn't taken a single bite. "Only if you eat three bites," Phil interrupted. Wilbur was confused at first, ready to reject the idea and let her leave, but the crow looked at him with eyes that said 'trust me', so he hesitantly nodded. "Three bites first," the brunette agreed, watching with fear as his daughter looked afraid. "I-uh- I'm really not hungry," she laughed nervously, crossing her arms over her stomach. "Tallulah Rose Soot, you will not leave this table until you eat three bites. Even if you aren't hungry, it's what's good for you body," demanded her father, watching the girl struggle to pick up the fork again. She decided to go for the salad, since it was healthier and had less calories. 

       A single spinach leaf, she'd picked up, and bit it slowly. It wasn't any easier eating as people watched, all three looking worried. She hesitantly ate it and swallowed, only two more left. Another piece of that green vegetable. "I'd like you to eat the spaghetti too," Wilbur encouraged as she went for another piece of spinach. The girl bit her lip, but agreed. She twirled three noodles around the fork and ate them. "Now may I be excused?" She choked, tears threatening to spill. "Yes, you're free," said Wil with a frown. As soon as Tallulah was upstairs, Wilbur turned to his father, who also wore a frown. "I'm worried about her," Chayanne muttered, looking at the food left on the table. "She's been acting like this for two weeks," he continued, looking at Phil. "She has? Chayanne, did she eat at all when Wil and I went to Twitchcon?" 

       Chayanne swallowed, recalling the past. "I remember waking up the first morning that you left, and hearing her cry from her room. She was obviously trying to hide it, but I heard her and went to check up on her. She said that she just wasn't feeling well, and I asked if she wanted anything to eat.... She said no and hadn't eaten at all that day. The second day she ate a small breakfast but nothing else, and then I don't remember the other two days. I don't think she's doing well mentally, Dad," the blonde boy suggested. "I'm going to talk to her," Wilbur said, pushing his chair in and walking upstairs.

        Meanwhile, the brunette girl looked down at her two arms. She was a week clean, but the urge was so hard to resist. Sometimes she longed to feel the cold blade against her warm skin, sometimes she longed for the slight burning sensation that the blade brought to her, and this day was just one of those days. Walking into her bathroom, she looked in the mirror. She was beautiful, and horribly skinny, yet she still felt as if she didn't belong in her own body. The next few seconds wer a blur of a red liquid and a purple blade, resulting in that burning sensation that she longed to feel. 

        The silent cries were becoming harder and harder to control, she bursted not much later. But, through loud cries and silent words, she hadn't heard her bedroom door creak open. She'd forgotten to lock it, and the bathroom door was wide open. However, even though she had pretty poor hearing, she heard the footsteps. Wilbur had practically yanked the blade from her hand. She gasped, cries quieting for a second as she stared into his brown, glossy eyes, concern expressed through quick movements and mutters. 

        "I'm really sorry," she paused, attempting to come up with an explanation before more sobs shook her fragile, pale body. "Oh, my petal," Wil broke, kneeling on one knee and hugging her close. "Why did you do it honey?" He whispered, rubbing her back. "I-I don't know Papi.... I was just sad- and I... I don't f-feel like I belong in my body," she explained, hugging her dad tightly as he picked her up. "Tallulah, listen to me. You're 10, you shouldn't be going through a time like this. Maybe you never were a fighter physically, but mentally, you're so strong. If part of you ever feels like doing this again, fight it, and come talk to us. Chayanne, Phil, and I are here for you, okay? We'll always be here when you need us most." 

        For the first time in a while, Tallulah put on a genuine smile. "Thank you Papi. I'm really sorry for doing this," she said gesturing to her bloody arms. "We're gonna get you fixed up, alright? And Tallulah, you belong in your body. You belong here. We love you, we always will," the brunette finished, kissing his daughter's forehead. "How about we go get some ice cream, huh?" He smiled. 

      "I'd love that," Tallulah smiled back, hopping down from her father's arms and carefully cleaning up the mess, making sure to throw away the blades. She'd not need them for a long time. "There's my petal that I remember," Wilbur smiled, helping her. "I'm so proud of you."