Erm... So... Basically (One Direction Fan Fic)

Chapter 18

Harry’s POV

    I looked out into the night sky, wondering where I was going to go from here. I couldn’t believe our second album was coming out in a few months, and I also couldn’t wrap my mind around the thought that I found someone completely perfect for me, she was everything I needed and more. I thought back to the time she imitated Paul in the lobby, she had no care in the world, thinking about it made me smile. I smiled till I snapped back to reality.

She wasn’t mine.

    Right then, the sliding glass door opened, and there stood Marilyn. She was wearing shorts and a green sweatshirt that matched the color of my favorite beanie. Her eyes were vulnerable and helpless, and she didn’t appear very strong. I jumped a tad when I saw her, she sort of just came out of no where, but I was glad she was here. After I asked her if everything was alright, without notice, she ran into me for a hug. Her face dug into my body and in response I brought my body into hers to bring her safety, although, something made my heart beat speed up. It often did around her, but something was different tonight, I felt nervous, her heart beat then got faster as well. Maybe this was a mutual feeling. When she looked up at me, she started to cry. I had never seen her like this before, and the feeling of worry that was coming onto me was absolutely terrible.

“I don’t think I’m good enough, Harry. For any of this. For a record, to tour, i’m just not good enough.” She confessed. I couldn’t believe I was hearing her say this, It frustrated me to see her lose faith in herself.

“Don’t you dare say that! You’re spectacular. You have every ability as anyone out there. More than most.” I recalled, then gently placed my thumb on her face, whipping the tears away. I then slowly brought my fingers to the strands of her slight wavy hair, covering her face, I moved them away so I could see her eyes. We starred into each other for a moment, I admired the way the light shined upon her, the form of her lips, the green in her eyes, and just the way she looked at me.

    When she brought her head down to break the stare, I tried my best to think of something that could cheer her up…

“So…erm…basically… this probably isn’t the best time to inform you about this, but management decided it would be an absolute honor to have you come on tour with us.” I said to her with a gentle smirk. When she looked up at me I could tell she was excited, she just didn’t know how to show it at the moment, or if she even could.

“But… but do I even deserve this opportunity?” She asked me as all the tears streamed down her face. I put both of my hands on the side of her cheeks to prove to her my realness. I felt like the stare I was giving her at first was a little too shocked (because I was) so I loosened up before I informed her that I believe she deserved,

“Every ounce of it.”

When she looked back up at me, I could tell she knew I meant it, because I truly did. I had more faith in her than I did in myself, and I’ve know myself way longer than a month.

“Harry, I don’t think I’m as strong as you… I don’t know if I can handle the pressure of impressing everyone.” She quietly talked, but it came off so strong. I scrunched my eyebrows in the confusion I still had.  The strength Marilyn had was exceptional! I don’t think she realized everything she was doing/ had done was worthy. She had left home at a moments notice, was living alone with her best friend at 17, working with professionals like it was nothing, and winning over absolutely everyone she met.

“You’re wrong. You’re stronger than me. I look at you and see everything I wish I was, and could be. But you have something I don’t. You just have… it. This is your destiny.” I spoke. I didn’t realize how close my face was to her until she brought hers away to whip off extra tears.  She leaned over the balcony and looked into the sky, I carefully made my way beside her. I looked up into the sky at the familiar star I had always watched. Even though it was smaller than some of the others around it, it always managed to outshine them.

“See how bright that star is shining?” I pointed to it.

I had realized the other night why I loved this star so much, it reminded me of Marilyn. The brightness in it, the way it out shined the others, the beauty, everything. It was becoming it’s own, just like her. I informed her of this and she started to cry harder, she watched the words I was saying in total astonishment, I hoped she was happy about them.

It was time for me to be honest with her, so I confessed to her something rather personal.

“I haven’t known you long Mary,” I started, “but you are the most fantastic, talented, funny… and beautiful girl I know. Everything about you is a dream.” I announced, stepping closer and closer to her. She had been staring at the ground, still rubbing her eyes.

“Harry…” She began, then stopped when she noticed me right in front of her. When our view met again, I was in awe of the way her eyes were. You’d think the tears would have made her eyes red, but they actually sparkled more than normal.

    The feelings I was feeling when I looked at her at that moment, made my stomach knot up. I was absolutely head over heels for her, and this bothered me. It bothered me because for a moment I felt the confidence to tell her, but at the same time, the fear of rejection made me sick. The feeling between us was too overwhelming. I had to break it, so I looked up and rubbed the back of my neck anxiously. She then turned her little head away as well, she seemed a tad bit embarrassed. I turned my back to her after that, I wouldn’t have been able to say what was coming next if I would have been looking at her.

“From the second I saw you, I knew you were something that was going to bother me…” I said, knowing she wouldn’t understand right now.

I waited a moment until she questioned me frustrated.

I still didn’t turn to face her, and I felt light tears appearing in my face.

“You just said all these nice things about me, making me feel the nicest I’ve ever felt, and now I bother you? What’s that about…” She asked emotionally.

Her words broke my heart. I suddenly became angry at myself, for hiding my feelings all this time.

It was time to man up to these emotions, and it was time for Marilyn to know.

“Why? You want to know why!?” I turned to face her, running my fingers through my hair. I was beyond the point of being nervous.

I was done pretending all of this wasn’t real.

It was time to take a risk.

“This is why!”

Right then and there I grabbed Marilyn’s waist and pulled her directly towards me, and without a moment for me to hesitate, I kissed her. Without trying, it was passionate… yet gentle. I wanted her to know all my feelings for her were real. It didn’t take too long for her to kiss me back, she lightly placed one of her hands on my cheek, and the other on the back of my neck.

She played with my curls a little bit, which was a major turn on.

I had never had a kiss like that before, it felt so right. She was right for me, I found someone that was right for me, goosebumps ran down my arms at that thought.

And maybe… just maybe…

She felt the same way.

When we pulled away I looked down at her with my eyes not open much, honestly my eyes were trying to be seductive but she probably thought it was weird. I then noticed her look at my lips again, which were parted a bit… I wanted to kiss her longer. I’ve been waiting so long to do that.

“You’re absolutely crazy, Harry Styles. Crazy.” She said playfully.

I took this as an “ok” for me to kiss her again, so I gave her a flirtatious smile and brought my lips to hers, much softer this time, and slower. The moonlight on you when you kiss the girl of your dreams, kind of rocks, by the way.

When we pulled away this time I looked down at her with openness. The way it felt to put all of my emotions into account and run with them was amazing.

“That’s why.” I finally answered her.

“Because it’s taken absolutely all my strength not to do that.”

And she smiled.