My Savage Love for You

How Not to Avoid a White Man

Jason

I woke up the day after my "almost-kiss" with Penn feeling sick to my stomach. I had to meet with the anonymous hater that day and at a park of all places. I usually had no issue dealing with haters, but this time, they had my phone number, so they must've been someone I knew personally. I've always had a hatred for drama because it never ends well. I really hoped that luck would be on my side that day as I got ready to meet this anonymous person.

I didn't really find dressing up to be important that day and showed up at the park in heather gray joggers and a random T-shirt. It seemed that the hater wasn't there yet, so I sat and waited on a bench in the shade.

I tried to guess who would show up. "It has to be someone I know if they have my personal phone number, right?" I wondered. "But who do I know that is so against me dating Penn? The only people that know about my feelings for him are Kim and..." I thought long and hard to think of other people who know about Penn and me. Finally, I realized, "Wait, it's only Kim. But Kim could never be the person to send me a text like this. We're not like that. Plus, Penn is definitely not her type."

"Hey, Jason."

I looked up and saw Sierra looking down at me with her lips pursed.

"Sierra? It's nice to see you! What are you doing here?" I asked.

"Uh..." Sierra began. "Well, I'm the one who's supposed to be meeting you here," she said awkwardly.

"Oh!" I exclaimed. I felt embarrassed, yet surprised that Sierra was the one who sent me those messages. Although I knew she seemed to have a thing with Penn, I didn't think that she was the type of person to send a message like that.

"Why did you send me these texts? And how did you get my phone number?" I asked bitterly.

Sierra replied in a harsh tone, "Why do you think I sent you those texts? I want you to back off of my boyfriend! Penn and I are dating now, in case you weren't aware, and the last thing our relationship needs is for you to be a distraction to Penn!"

I stood up, put my hand in Sierra's face, and said, "Girl, you sent me those texts because you think your man won't be able to resist me and my biceps? That is such a nice compliment! Thank you!"

"Whatever!" Sierra shouted as she pushed my hand away. "But at the end of the day, Penn is mine! If you ever get in my way, I will make sure you regret it!" she screamed with her index finger in my face. She stormed out, click-clack-ing away in her little heels.

I chuckled at how petty she was. When she disappeared around the corner, I went home and messaged Kim. I told her about the weird text that I received last night and how I had just found out it was Sierra. A few seconds after my message was delivered, she called me.

"Sierra as in Penn's friend, Sierra!?" Kim said in shock.

"Who else would it be, Kim?" I rhetorically asked in annoyance.

"So what happened? What did she say?"

"She basically said 'Back off of Penn or else!' then I asked, 'Why? Are you scared that Penn won't be able to resist my muscles and flawless complexion?' and she left. You also should've seen the way that she stormed out. She looked so cute trying to angrily strut her way out of the park," I laughed.

"Oh, you know I would've had so many names for her!" Kim replied. "So what are you going to do now? Are you still going to continue to hang out with Penn? Or are you going to 'obey' Miss Sierra Mist?"

"I honestly don't know, Kim. I really like Penn and I think that it's super shady of Sierra to tell me off like that. At the same time though, I feel that since Sierra felt the need to confront me that way, she must also really like Penn. Maybe I should do as Sierra says and back off. After all, she did say they were dating, not just messing around."

"Hmm, that's true, Jason. That would probably be for the best. Plus, there are other Caucasian fish in the sea. Maybe your encounter with Sierra was a sign that Penn isn't the one."

"Yeah... you're right," I said quietly. The pain I was feeling in my heart was making it hard for me to speak. This felt incredibly unfair because I liked Penn so much and was really hoping that I would get to kiss him sometime soon. But I knew that it would've been even more unfair for Sierra if the man she was dating had cheated on her.

I decided once and for all that I would be the mature, alpha male in this situation and respect Sierra's wishes. Though, I knew it wouldn't be easy to simply "back off" from the guy that I've been in love with for weeks.

Since it was still early, I went to swim a few laps at the gym to try to get my mind off of things. The feeling of the cool water on my face as I came up for air and back down was more refreshing than most of my swimming sessions lately. The longer I swam, the more I was reminded of that day at the aquatic center with Penn. I thought about the way he made me feel when we were sitting at the poolside. He always listened to what I had to say and made me feel seen.

"Jason?" a man's voice called in curiosity.

I stopped swimming and stood in the pool. The water in my eyes made the figure of the shirtless man look blurry. I swept the water off of my face to get a better look and noticed it was the one man I had to avoid.

I thought to myself in trepidation, "What do I do? Sierra would be upset if she knew I spoke to him."

Without giving it much thought, I sunk my head under the water to try to avoid Penn. Once my head was submerged in the public pool that we all know is blue urine, I swam to the opposite side of the pool and quickly ran off.

When I got in my car, still wet from being in too much of a hurry to dry off, I was still in shock that I had run into Penn. I felt like an idiot. "Of course, he would be at the gym to swim!" I thought.

I realized how close I was to failing the one job that I had. I felt so bad for Sierra. "If I could hardly avoid that man for a few hours, how am I supposed to 'back off' of him forever?" I wondered in frustration.

I stayed home for the rest of the day, too scared to go anywhere in case I would run into him again. While I was watching TikTok in my living room, I got a text from Penn.

I was so startled that I dropped my phone and covered my agape mouth. "Should I read it? Should I ignore it? Should I have blocked him by now?" I contemplated.

I picked up my phone which was still playing the Toxic Gossip Train choreography on repeat. I was too curious to not open the message.

"Hey, thought I saw you at the pool today. Made me think that we should go swimming together again," it read.

"AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!" I roared. I wanted more than anything to reply to his message with excitement about the possibility of the date leading to a kiss, but I knew I couldn't. I felt so powerless in that moment. The only thing I was able to do was exit the app and respect Sierra's wishes.