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Poetry

This is a collection of poems from a fat girl's diary. Come spend a day in my shoes... or should I say curves?

Guilty

236 29 15

by Breeny

by Breeny

Date of Entry: 7.13.23

Why should I feel guilty
For things you call normal?
Like eating candy
Or wearing a skirt
And considered to be abnormal?

Why do I get the stares
When I grab an extra slice?
They say, "you sure?"
Like I shouldn't
And think twice.

Not only do I have to
Watch what I eat.
But watch the way
People see me eat it
Try to stay nice and neat

If I eat my food too fast,
I'm greedy
If I eat too sloppy,
I'm a pig

"You have to watch what you put
In your body,
Or you'll end up
Getting too big"

The advice came from a good place
The first three times
It was said,
But after ten people
Have said it
It starts messing with your head

You feel like you're
Being watched
You feel like you're
Being judged

And as much as you
Try to convince yourself you're not
That simple doubt
Won't budge

I can tell you I'm not insecure
And that I'm gonna eat whatever I want
But at the end of the day, I'm still gonna give you
This exact same response:

"No, I'm not that hungry"
"I just ate before I came"
"No, I promise I'm all set"
Til I stop feeling the shame

I'll pick at my plate
While everyone else digs in
Like indulging in my food
Is the world's greatest sin

Yes, I know it's in my head
And it always will be
Until the day I eat my food
And finally not feel guilty