Melancholy of a Goddess

Chapter 4

"I'm going to overload the world with fun!"

Those were the words I said when I first found out what I could do. Those same words have been repeated throughout my life. Overloading the world with fun was one of the reasons why I wanted worshippers in the first place. I was a goddess, but I wasn't going to be a mean one to them. After all, I just wanted to overload the world with fun... Of course, that wouldn't be possible given the circumstances I'm in.

Haruhi Suzumiya is made up of two parts. The first part is the conscious, which contains the information the person is aware of. The second part is the subconscious, which contains hidden information the person isn't aware of.

Haruhi Suzumiya used to be one whole being, but it all changed when she learned about the existence of the supernatural. No, that's not what triggered it... What triggered the change was the fact she realized she was a goddess. Haruhi Suzumiya believed every word of it, but her common sense still doubted the entire encounter. Her emotions began to become conflicted, until her conscious and subconscious split apart. The conscious got to stay in her world, without any memories of the encounter. The subconscious got sent to a duplicate universe, where she remembered everything that happened. Then the subconscious ended up growing into me.

What does this mean for me? Well, it means that I can't use my powers the way I want to. The conscious and subconscious have to agree in order for the power to work without limits. If they don't agree, then the abilities or wishes would never manifest in the way they want it to. The conscious Haruhi values logic and reasoning, while I value absurdity and insanity. Nothing I say will make any sense to the conscious Haruhi, so it'll either be neglected or converted into something that makes sense... That's why everyone didn't believe me when I told them that I was a goddess... If anything, they usually told me this.

"You're crazy..."

"Who'd want to be with a goddess who does nothing?"

"Seriously, stop playing pretend."

"Heh, I bet you're gonna say you can fly too!"

"Get away from her... She's nuts."

I was met with this day after day after day... At some point, I just stopped caring for these people. From that point on, I wanted to punish them. I wanted them to apologize for everything they said to me. I wanted them to praise me. I wanted them to stop making so much fun of me... I thought it would change once I got to junior high, but I only got the same results here...

Sad and alone, I went to the North High school. I usually went there whenever I felt down, so I just sat there brooding. Seriously, I'm a goddess. I'm special! This isn't the treatment I should've gotten! Those thoughts I had as I reached the school. Then, something interesting happened.