𝒉𝒐𝒘 𝒕𝒐 𝒅𝒊𝒔𝒂𝒑𝒑𝒆𝒂𝒓 ✞𝑡𝑜𝑚 𝑘𝑎𝑢𝑙𝑖𝑡𝑧✞

part fourty-four

Robyn and Kaya met every night on the hospital roof to smoke. Robyn laughed at the irony of it all, remembering how this has became the ritual of her and and Tom on the garage roof. Things were different now.

Robyn had surprisingly learnt a lot about the stranger she met at the vending machine: she was very academic and high aspiring; very independent; had shitty parents; heavily relied on substances and was itching to break out of this place. Because of their similarities, they instantly clicked.

Laughter pained at Robyn's stomach and cheeks as she flushed bright red in hysterics. Similarly, Kaya laughed between drags, her feet swinging loosely over the edge of the rooftop.

"Wait, so are we really going to do this?" Robyn questioned as she caught her breath.

"Yeah, why not?" Kaya replied as if it was obvious, pushing the small cloud of smoke past Robyn's face.

"You're serious?" she clarified, her eyes serious as they met hers across the thin smoke.

"Deadly"

~*~

The hospital corridor was derelict and dark, no movement or sound except the perpetual ticking of the clock at the nurses station- a constant reminder to Robyn of just how quick she had to be.

Alone, she carefully tread lightly on her bare feet, feeling the cool hospital floors against her flushed skin. Despite the silence, she could hear her heart thudding in her temples and chest, her hands growing clammy with anxiety and she tip toed.

It being two am, she had successfully slipped from the bed and past the folded Jay in the chair beside her, sighing as she gave him one last look before she left. In the darkness, his face looked peaceful and soundly sleeping beside her bed, all of the anger he typically wore on his face dormant beneath his sleep. She had to admit, it was hard to leave him, hard to imagine a life without him, a life where she could move on. But she had to do it.

So, she continued down the darkened hallway with this thought in mind, knowing that for once, she was doing this for herself.

Rounding the corner, she saw as the familiar silhouettes and shadows of machines projected onto the floor, her gaze fixed upon it, not daring to look up until she was comfortably beside him. Lightly, she approached, a wave of familiarity and nostalgia hitting her as she saw him. Unlike in the white hospital light though the day, Elliot looked almost normal in the bed, all of the wires and machines hidden by the darkness. Perching on the edge of his bed, she found his limp hand and interlaced her fingers with his. He was cold.

Feeling this, Robyn pulled his thin sheet further around him, tucking the fabric beneath his chin before her hands found it's way over his face, tracing soft circles against his skin. Her eyes glossed with tears at the thought of leaving him, his innocent face kissed by moonlight being the only thought she could process at once- she just stared at him.

"I'm sorry, I really am. I hope in some time or place I will be a better person for you. You deserve that" she whispered down into him, the words croaking out painfully as a single tear rolled down her cheek and landed on his forehead. "I love you" she added, leaning down and kissing his forehead as her hands cradled his head. She wished she could stay, only for him.

"Robyn" Kaya's voice half whispered from the doorway. Trapped in her own thoughts of Elliot, Robyn remained with her forehead pressed against his, unaware of her presence.

"Robyn!" she repeated, taking a few gentle steps towards her "We have to go, like now"

Brushing her tears away, Robyn brushed her hand gently over Elliot's forehead once more, taking in every inch of his sweet face before she gingerly crept from his bed and approached Kaya.