𝒉𝒐𝒘 𝒕𝒐 𝒅𝒊𝒔𝒂𝒑𝒑𝒆𝒂𝒓 ✞𝑡𝑜𝑚 𝑘𝑎𝑢𝑙𝑖𝑡𝑧✞

part thirteen

From a very young age, Robyn understood the world of fame and especially the music industry. Touring had been a part of her life for as long as she could remember so as she knelt on the floor beside the Kaulitz house, she expected nothing more than a brief check in. Despite this, she always hoped for more and unfortunately, her father never exceeded this expectation. He was no different.

"I have to bring you here baby, you would love it" Axel's voice spoke through the small speaker on her cellphone. Sarcastically, she laughed at his predictability; his words meant nothing.

"You always say that" she defended. There was a silence as the slight static could be heard from the receiving end.

"Something wrong Rob?" he asked, his words sudden and semi-confrontational.

She sighed, leaning her head back onto the hard brick of the house, the phone tucked against her ear.

"Rob?" he repeated "You there baby?"

While silent, she imagined a scenario where she could talk with him about Jay and Elliott and Tom and gain some useful advice but that fantasy quickly subsided as she thought of her fathers absent-minded words and inability to remember anything she told him.

"Yep, here dad" she eventually replied with a large sigh.

Axel had been a good father for Robyn in her younger years. Amongst all of the controversial press, drinking and partying, he always prioritised his family and tried his best to hide that side of his lifestyle from them. But when Robyn's mom got sick, he couldn't balance everything at once and set aside his career to move back to his hometown for the good hospitals and an attempt to salvage his daughter's childhood. In a way, Robyn resented him for his childish coping mechanisms and existential crisis that drove them further from each other, but simultaneously, she had never known a life without his obsession with fame. A few years later, he decided to return to the tour life but found that his popularity had entirely washed up and without Lisa, he had no roots or grounding. So, he stayed on the road as a supporting or opening act, spending more money on booze and flights than what he was even grossing in profit. Because of this, he was just another lonely man who used to be famous in another life.

"How's school?" he asked, ignoring their previous spat.

"School finished last week Dad. It's summer" she explained bluntly, not bothering to retaliate or correct him. In response, she heard a simple hum.

"Is Alicia still coming over often?" he asked again, speeding the typical conversation up.

"Yep, every couple days." she replied in a similar quick and blunt manner.

"Good, good" he stalled "I'll send you some more money soon, I just need a few days to pay people back" he explained. She grew numb to his false promises.

She hummed, nodding her head against the brick.

"Well, I've got to head back for the afterparty. Stay out of trouble" he concluded their conversation. She remained in a defiant silence, thinking over all of the times this exact interaction has played out over the last month.

"I love you Rob" he spoke after a short pause. Inside, her chest fell at the sound of his voice while she closed her eyes.

"I love you too" she replied, unsure how to feel as the words escaped her lips: She hated his attempt to be a functional father, but she missed him.

The line went silent for a moment before a small beep indicated he had hung up. Hearing this, she furrowed her brows and tightly closed her eyes, closing her cellphone and letting it fall to her lap. Once again, her hopes were too high.