CHECKERED FLAG - c.l [2]

REMEMBER

The house was quiet, Fleetwood following me at my feet as I tread through the house in the early hours of the morning.

I had woken up at 4 AM after tossing and turning all night, crying in my sleep.

I open the fridge, the light making me wince as the sun was yet to start peeking out over the horizon.

I toss a slice of ham to Fleetwood which he takes happily, sitting down and waiting for more.

It was now 4 days after my dads funeral and I was yet to make my mind up if I was going to go back to Mercedes, Toto had been blowing up my phone trying to convince me to come back, but I was yet to reply.

Dee was staying here for the week, having been firm that I shouldn't be staying on my own at the moment as if I was going to top myself or something.

I grab the bottle of orange juice and swig it back, not bothering to put it in a glass, despite my dad always lecturing me about it.

I scroll through my Instagram feed, liking and commenting on a few team photos that had been posted the past few days.

The Mercedes admin had posted a picture of my dad that they had captured during one of the races last season when I was with Ferrari, sending their condolences.

I look through some of the text notifications I was yet to reply to, a lot of them coming from Charles, Lewis and George all checking in on me but I was too exhausted to say 'I'm fine' over and over again.

The flowers Charles had sent me were starting to look a little sorry for themselves as I walk over to the vase, changing the water so they could stay alive for as long as they could.

"Can't sleep?" Dee's voice makes me jump as she walks into the kitchen, emerging from the darkness of the dining room.

"Jesus woman, at least call out that you're coming in, almost made me piss myself," I laugh lightly, passing her the bottle of juice as I hoist myself up and onto the counter.

"One day I'll be able to sleep through the night," I mumble out, look out across the kitchen and into the dining room at my dad's empty chair, his jacket still hanging off the back.

"I spoke to George at the wake," I change the subject as she's looking through the fridge for something to eat, settling on a container of left over pasta.

"That's good, that's good right?" she raises an eyebrow at me with a mouthful of pasta.

"He said we should just stay friends," I shrug my shoulders at her.

I was a little upset to say the least but it was last on my list of worries right now, but I was glad he wasn't going to let what happened effect our friendship.

"Said it would be awkward to have anything serious as teammates, then went of a rampage about how I need to get back to the grid," I roll my eyes as I jump down off the counter, opening the front door for the dog to go outside to pee.