RESPONDING TO HER LOVE

DEAL WITH SLOW MATURITY

"A life with dreams and desires keep the heart pumping and waking up a blessing. Its a better medicine".

Queen POV

After yesterday's events and break up saga with Michael. I couldn't sleep. I kept tossing from one side to other, I think my body temperature is high. I can't remember how many times I woke up, panting and shivering. I got out of bed and took cold water to wash my face, to help calm my heartbeat. The nightmare that I had was scary.

I was having flashes of beautiful moments with Michael, but they usually ended up with me being trapped and unable to move my body.

I never wanted to go back to sleep again but my eyes are heavy with sleep. I tried to scream one time but can't. No sound was coming out. I wanted to call my friend sitting beside me but I was being dragged by the hand upward into the sky. I was kicking to free myself, its not working, until I felt cold water on my forward and I woke again. Loveth was pressing wet towel on my forehead.

"Its alright, I'm here with you". She said. "Your body is covered with sweat and you have slight fever...",

"What's the time?" I asked her but my voice was sounding groggy.
"Its still 3:45am, go back to sleep. We will go to clinic in the morning".

"I don't understand why the dawn is taking so long! How I wish I can pray. God please, help me to get through this night, I'm scared".

I started to fantasize about Ken, his handsome face, something to occupy my mind with. l thought about all the things we will do together. I want to make him mine. I want to free myself, like an eagle and soar into the sky straightforward with him, fly against the wind, reckless.

I didn't know when I dozed off into a dream full of possibilities. I felt a very heavy weight on my body, I tried desperately to shake it off, is it another nightmare or what? I felt like I don't want to open my eyes, let me sleep more, though am fully awake now. This heavy weight ontop my body is stressing me already. Maybe, its one of my friends lying beside me that put her leg on me. When I opened my eyes finally, its to blinding light of daybreak....

"Who the hell opened the windows?, please close them". I tried speaking but my head was pounding.

"Ugh! The fever is serious. Feeling weak is not option today because I've goal to achieve..."

Today is Sunday. I want to go to service, to go and thank God for a beautiful daybreak. I guess tonight has taught me to be grateful.

Thanks to my friends also, Loveth and Christie, they watched out for me all through the night. Taking turns to lie beside me.
Loveth went and got hot water from kitchen for me. After taking my bathe, I took hot chocolate tea and bread and they accompanied me to clinic. The medicine they gave me was bitter and many, but its not optional if I wish to recover quickly. I didn't join them to breakfast in the hall but got prepared for chapel. I desired to go early, its been awhile.

I'm not usually the type to feel down or be lonely often. So, now is not a happy moment and I feel anxious.
I started walking to chapel in my white dress; skirt and shirt with scarf on my head.
How I managed to reach chapel was a miracle. God is really on my side today. Every step I took was like, I was carrying log of wood. I'm still feeling cold but I've made up my mind.