WARNING: TALKS OF SELF HARM, DRUGS, ALCOHOL AND S.A
Flashbacks.
Being teleported back into a place and time,
But it's only in your mind.
Why does it play tricks?
Bringing us back to what we want to forget?
That night when he hurt you,
That day I lost my innocence,
And the day you lost yours.
I forgot mine, until I was 14.
10 years of bliss,
Until that bliss crashed,
Ugly truth shattering everything.
I heard how he first scarred you,
My veins turning to fire,
Then mine hit,
After you told me yours.
You never deserved it,
We couldn't fight back,
Too drugged and too young,
Our innocence torn away.
The flashbacks keep coming back,
Haunting us like ghosts.
The days we lost our innocence,
Always coming back.
Some days it freezes you to your core,
And you can't move away from it,
You text me,
Unsure what to do.
"Deep breaths" I say to you,
Anger at what he's done to you.
You have to carry yours all the time,
While I can't remember all of mine.
You remember the entire feeling,
Including your emotions during it.
All I remember,
The feeling of him in me,
Sends shivers down my spine.
Flashbacks happen rarely,
But they happen always for you.
I don't know how to help,
Adults don't believe you.
Your mother thought you lied,
Your therapist will tell the police.
I've been bound by our word,
And no evidence for either.
Mine are in their 30s,
But do they even remember?
Yours still lives in our town,
He remembers you too.
Flashbacks haunt us of our lost innocence.
I've managed mine,
You can't handle yours,
I never blame you.
So you down the pills and the alcohol,
Destroying yourself in the process,
If you never lost your innocence,
Would I have ever remembered mine?
Flashback tie us down to that day.
The day we lost our childhood essence.
When I was 4, I was sexually assaulted by my baby sitters twin sons, both were high schoolers. I don't remember much, except their fingers in places they never should have been. My best friend, in the summer of 2022, was drugged at a party and hurt there. We both lost our innocence when this happened to us. Her mother doesn't believe her, she asked why my friend would make this up. My parents when I first told them, didn't really care. They apologized for it and asked about dinner plans.
I help my friend when the flashbacks get too bad. I wish I could take her pain, she never deserved it. No one deserves it and I would never wish it on anyone.
YOU ARE READING
Poems of a Teenager
PoetryA collection of poems I wrote to get feelings out. Most of these poems contain mentions of sexual assault, possible abuse and self harm. It is about my journey through my teenage years. I still have some more years to go. I update whenever I write a...
