(THERE'S SOME TRAUMATIC EXPERIENCES AND BULLYING SAID HERE, IF YOU THINK YOU'RE GETTING BULLIED AND GETTING TRAUMATIZED BY SOME SHIT OTHERS DO, YOU NEED TO ASK FOR PROFESSIONAL HELP, HOPE YOU ARE OKAY)
After i was done with crying, me snd matt are sitting on the bed, I'm sitting stretching my legs in front of me and matt has his knees in front of him, he's putting his head on his hands looking at me smiling, i look at him awkwardly
"do you feel better now?" He asks, i nod smiling,
"can i ask you a question?" Matt asks, i nod
"why were you so scared that we would leave you Or hate you? Is it because we made you feel like we'll leave someday or is it because of something else?" He asks,
god, how am i supposed to answer that question?, i don't respond for a few seconds then i answer
"it's not something you did, I'm just, i.." i hesitate a little
"it's okay, you don't have to tell me if you don't want to" matt says,
"no no, i want to, I'll tell you" i take a deep breath
"it's because i was bullied at my old school, the kids would dug my head in the toilets, make fun of how i look, make fun of me generally, but one day i made a friend, she was one of the popular kids at school, so when she became my friend i gained a lot of other friends, i stopped getting bullied, i thought everything was finally done, i was so happy that i finally have friends so i opened up to them, more than i should have, so i once talked to my friends about the kids that bullied me, and how i hated them, then they all would talk shit about the bullies and say that they hate them too, and i started telling them anything that comes to my mind, whatever it is, but one day i went to school and found a post about me, and it says that i talked shit about my friends, that I said some unreal shit about some kids that they bullied me, and that i copy my other friends to look good like them, that I'm a whore that wants to be with any boy, and sleeps with boys, that i act all nice but I'm actually a bitch, these things are not real and honestly not that big of a deal to traumatize me, but what traumatized me was their reaction, they all believed it, they didn't even give me a chance to explain or tell them the truth, they all assumed that this things are right, and turned their back to me, like we never were friends, that's why I'm scared to say anything in my mind so others don't take it the wrong way, that's why I'm scared that any friends i make would leave me, that's why i ask Janessa what she's going to wear everyday so i wear the opposite, that's why I'm scared of talking to people or interacting with them, I'm scared of people's opinions about me" i explain,
I can't actually Cry, because i cried numerous times about this that i can't anymore, i look at matt to see his eyes teary, he hugs me
"I'm sorry, i didn't know you went through this, i should have been there for you" he says as his tears fall on my shoulder,
"it's okay, how would you have known" i say as i pat on him, i move him back gently and wipe his tears, i smile
"I was so scared to face nick when this post got apploaded , because then he would have already known that i like him, i was scared to face you all, but I'm not anymore, because i trust you guys, i trust that you believe me, and i won't believe a shit said about me anymore" i say,
he smiles proudly, i smile back at him, i will talk with nick tomorrow, i know I'll be just alright.
I wake up to the sun taking over my room, i look beside me on the bed, it's matt, he stayed with me the whole day yesterday, i turn my whole body so now I'm looking at him fully, he's also turned to me, i gaze at him as the sun shines behind him, he looks so beautiful in the sun light, i smile more the more i look , I'm not sure what time it is, but I'm going to keep gazing at him until the alarm rings, i tap on his nose like i did last time, but he didn't move, and when i move my hand to tap again, matt suddenly holds my finger, he leaves his eyes closed for a little bit more then opens it, he was awake all this time? We keep looking at each other without saying anything, I smile awkwardly
YOU ARE READING
𝘊𝘢𝘯 𝘪 𝘵𝘢𝘬𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘮 𝘣𝘢𝘤𝘬?_sturniolo triplets
Romancewhat happens when you fall in love with someone you can't be with, and be in a love triangle of two boys you don't like back, in a rollercoaster, will your feelings change, who will you choose?
