Charlie('s) Hope(less)

To be your number one.

TW// Ben being a bitch, manipulation, talk of abortion, emotional abuse, abuse in general, pregnancy and all that stuff. also a trans character who hasn't come out yet is referred to with the wrong name and wrong pronouns bc she's not out yet. this doesn't happen after she comes out btw don't worry bestie

...

It had only been five years ago when Charlie's fate was sealed. It was only eleven years ago when Charlie lost his name, no longer a Spring. When he and Ben got married, Ben insisted that Charlie took his last name. It was weird to adapt to having his name changed so suddenly, to go from Charlie Spring to Charlie Hope, but it made Ben happy.

It was only five years ago when Ben had crawled onto Charlie one night and whispered in his ear about wanting to have a baby with Charlie. At first, Charlie guessed it was just dirty talk, or a sleep-deprived Ben spilling his most random thoughts to Charlie, but Ben had brought it up the following day.

And he did. Nine months later they welcomed Malcolm Hope into the world. Malcolm took after Ben, the only things he took from Charlie were his curly hair and his dimples. Unlike either of them, Malcolm was shy. He'd hide behind Charlie's leg whenever they were at the check-out line at the grocery store and hesitated to make friends at school.

It was only two weeks ago when Charlie fell deeper into Ben's trap. It was only five minutes ago when Charlie had been looking over his shoulder constantly as he began to look for abortion laws in his area.

Malcolm spontaneously jumped onto Charlie, shaking him slightly. Charlie shut his laptop and sat up, glancing at the clock. "You're up early, huh bud?" Charlie ruffled Malcolm's curly brown hair. "You ready for school?" He asked as he kissed the top of Malcolm's head, making him giggle. "Daddy should be ready to drive you there," Charlie said as he opened his laptop to check his work email. "Daddy already went to work," Malcolm said. Charlie was taken aback and closed the computer again, "Alright... Guess you'll have me drive you there today, huh?" he tried to force a smile. "We've got a field trip today!" Malcolm said, shaking Charlie slightly. Charlie blinked. "Oh."

Perhaps it was a good thing he didn't have work that day, Charlie thought to himself as he started up the car. He agreed to chaperone Malcolm's field trips, as much as Malcolm adored his teacher, he would probably get anxious being surrounded by so many strangers without Charlie or Ben, and lately, Malcolm started to dislike Ben.

Malcolm was chattering about the field trip as Charlie drove to Malcolm's school. When he walked with him to his classroom, Malcolm was still talking. He was practically bouncing with excitement. Malcolm poked his head inside the classroom doorway, and when he saw it was empty he rushed in. Charlie stood outside for a moment longer, not entirely sure if he wanted to go in. In the end, he did go inside anyway.

Charlie ended up standing awkwardly next to the doorway while Malcolm was speaking animatedly to his teacher, Mr. Nelson. Usually, when Malcolm was in a place that had other people, he needed Charlie or Ben to let him explore or talk to the other people for a bit so he didn't clam up and get anxious. So, Charlie just ended up scrolling through his phone.

Guilt was rising in his gut, what was he doing? Here he was, in his son's classroom, trying to schedule an abortion. In the end, he mentally scrapped the idea. It would just enrage Ben, the recovery time and any possible complications would make it obvious what Charlie did. Ben wanted a second child, it's why he ditched condoms after Malcolm was born anyway.

And Charlie... He wasn't sure. Pregnancy took a toll on his body and mental state, he felt gross during his entire pregnancy with Malcolm, and he feels exhausted during this one. He did love Malcolm and he did want him, he would give up everything for that boy, but he hated being pregnant.