Charlie('s) Hope(less)

There Was Something Behind You

(TW: Ben being a controlling bitch)

He pushed his chair out and picked up the phone, not bothering to read the number.

“Hello?” He sat back down at the table, rolling up the empty muffin wrapper and turning it into a small ball. “You haven’t been responding to me.” Ben’s voice said on the other side of the line.

“My phone was off.” Charlie said, swirling his Wendy’s cup around to see if it had any soda left. “Why?” Ben asked. He sounded suspicious. “Didn’t want my notifications to blow up and keep me awake.” Charlie yawned. “Why would they be blowing up?” Ben asked, though it was more of a demand.

“Bunch of YouTubers upload during the morning.” Charlie tossed the wrapper into the trashcan, pumping his fist when he managed to get it in the first try. Sure, he was twenty-nine, but he could still do dumb shit like that. “Which ones?” Charlie could hear Ben clicking a pen in the background. “Grayson’s Projects and Atsuover I think.” Charlie really didn’t get why Ben was so concerned about YouTubers and their upload schedules.

“…You seriously watch those people?” Ben sounded to be judging Charlie. “…Yes?” Charlie dragged out the word. “Atsuover makes good music, not much else to say there.” That was technically a half-truth. He very well could’ve gushed about her music. “Plus I just want to support another trans person-“ Ben cut Charlie off, “Jesus christ, that’s the most pathetic excuse I’ve heard to date. Charlie, you don’t need to support anyone. Just because you’re trans doesn’t mean you automatically need to support other trans people.”

Charlie gripped the phone tightly. He knew Ben was thinking that Charlie felt like he needed to, or that the world would literally implode in on itself if he didn’t, but it still stung. “That’s… not what I meant. I genuinely like her music and I want to support her. It’s like how you try to support other bisexual people. Because they’re the first people who accepted you.” Charlie said. He tried to sound calm.

“But why?” Ben snapped. “Being trans- it isn’t that important. At least not important enough to support someone financially.”

Something in Charlie’s brain snapped, but he tried to restrain himself. He couldn’t yell at Ben. Not now, not ever. “It’s not just because they’re trans, it’s because I like what they do. They don’t- they don’t have a lot of job opportunities because they’re trans.” He hissed. “But you have a job.” Ben shot back.

Charlie sucked in a breath, trying to keep himself calm. “Some of those people don’t live here. They live in other countries.” He said.

He could hear a chair creaking in the background, meaning Ben had likely leaned back in his office chair. “That’s not the point. Charlie, I can tell you’re trying to skip breakfast.” Ben said.

“I literally just finished breakfast.” Charlie mentally facepalmed. Ben could just check the ring footage to see that he had, at the very least, brought in the bag.

Ben seemed to give up, “Fine.” He sighed. “Love you.” Ben said.

If Charlie could physically facepalm without Ben knowing, he would. “Love you too.” He muttered. He didn’t bother to wait for Ben’s response and just hung up.

Sure, it was a bit rude, but what else was there to say? Ben hated it when Charlie said ‘bye,’ instead preferring for Charlie to say ‘love you’ when ending a phone call.

He thought ‘bye’ was too negative.

Trust Ben to be ignorant about something regarding trans people. Charlie didn’t get how it was so hard for Ben to understand why Charlie would want to support other trans people. To Charlie, it was very obvious.

But hey, Ben was cis. Charlie wasn’t. As much as Ben loved Charlie and as long as he had been Charlie’s partner, he couldn’t understand trans topics or understand trans issues like Charlie could.

Though sometimes it felt like he wasn’t particularly trying to understand.