His hair was orange

-4-

„I knew id find you here."

that voice.
It was his fault that he couldnt set right today.

„The view is beautiful, dont you think ?"
kageyama stoped breathing for  a moment.
„I...i ... „ he tried  to say something to hinata and make him go away. Even though he knew he wanted him to stay.
His heart cried  for the warmth if this tangerine but his head told him to stay away.

Suddenly he felt  a hand on his back.
It was warm and welcoming and made him feel safe.

"its ok... kageyama. Its ok." hinata whispered and stroked his back.

A tear ran down kageyamas face.
Another followed.
And another one.
Quite soon kageyama was crying hard.
Harder then ever.
All of that pain and disappointment and that confusion that he has kept inside just suddenly all burst out.

Hinata stopped stroking his back for a second  and his eyes widened.
But before kageyama could blink, the gase had turned into a soft and loving like look.
The tears kept on running and falling from his chin onto hinatas lap.
Lika a waterfall it went on and he screamed a silent scream and cried and screamed again.

Slowly hinata pulled him into a hug making kageyama sobbing and wiping his tears onto his chest.

"Its all you" he whispered.
Hinata stopped stroking his hair and back.

"Me ? "
the confusion in his eyes was clear when kageyama looked at him through his blurred up vision that was caused by his tears.

"You. You confuse me and make me want to run away. You make my sets miserable and you keep me up at night."
He yelled as new tears hurst out onto his cheeks.

He laid  his head onto hinatas shoulder and let the soft smell of vanilla and oranges mix with the stinging smell of sweat, flow into his nostrils.
"you think its my fault?" Hinata asked softly and laid his chin onto kageyamas sweaty hair.
"i am sorry."
He whispered and hugged the setter.
"I am sorry kageyama."
He hugged him tighter making kageyamas eyes fill with tears again.
"I didnt mean to." He whispered.

Kageyama buried his nose into the middleblockers shoulder and sobbed.
He could feel the air flood with a strange feeling he had never even come near of before.
"You know, kageyama..." hinata began and started to stoke his back again.

It reminded kageyama of his grandfather when he was still little.
The white and grayish hair that slowly fell of.
Those sleepy blue eyes that used to always smile.
And that laugh that would make him laugh too.
His grandfather was the reason he ever touched a volleyball.
His grandfather was his only friend and person that didn't mind him.
And he was the one to help him find himself.

He could still so clearly remember the sad sparks in his eyes when the smile faded and his skin grew pale.
When his hair seemed to dangle of with his life.
And when his hand that was holding his , lost  its grip and fell back onto the white and medicine smelling like sheets of the bed in the hospital.
He could remember the stinging pain that grew and cut through him like a knife.
He could still feel his heart skip a beat and his eyes tear up like it all happened yesterday.
He remembered every inch of his body that was filled with such dark fog that had never really lifted.
The pain and poison that flooded him that day.

Kazuyo-kun.

He was only in second year when he got pulled out of class that day.

And he remembered every second of it.