On the Borderline- poems from someone with BPD, for people with BPD

Things that scare me the most

I'm scared you'll leave

I'm scared I'll lose you

I'd probably be in disbelief

I'm scared of the color blue

even if that's all I know how to feel

I'm scared of time

and scared of cars

I'm scared of myself

I'm scared of being left behind

but I'm so god awfully scared that one day you'll wake up and realize

I'm not the one you thought I was

I'm scared of the dark

that's where all my demons hide

I'm scared of the voices

they're oh so loud

I'm scared of not being enough

I'm scared that I'll never be enough

I'm scared of penetration

and yet I want it so badly

I'm scared of pain

because it's all I've felt since I was a baby

I'm scared that I'll never live up to my own expectations

and I'm scared that my cat hates me

I'm scared that the girl I like is just playing me

but I'm scared that my ex still loves me

I'm scared of being raped again

but I'm even more scared that I won't get revenge

I'm scared I won't ever be loved

because all I've ever craved was romantic love

and I cannot get enough

but maybe one day I'll be your favorite

and I'm scared of that day coming

because once that day gets here

there is never going to be anything more scary than losing it