❝everywhere, everything
i wanna love you 'til we're food for the worms to eat
'til our fingers decompose
keep my hand in yours❞-everywhere, everything, noah kahan
✿
the epilogue, LONG LOST FAMILY AND TALES OF GOLD
There are five stages of grief, or so all of the experts say. Denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance. I used to think that was bullshit.
I like to think I've experienced a special kind of grief. That I've become a sort of expert on the topic and I feel the need to correct that.
I, as many others believe those five stages are not only for the grieving left alive but the dying. Those who are given devastating news that leads them through those stages or even those processing them in the mere moments after something bad happens.
I've heard that not everyone experiences all five. I never got to ask what stages Ward Cameron had gone through or stopped at right before he jumped off the cliff to save us. If I had to guess, I suppose acceptance.
I believe that there is a sixth stage. A special sixth stage of grief meant for only those of us alive. Forgiveness. It's taken me a long time to realize that it too comes on with the others.
Ward Cameron, my mother's murderer and a man that harmed my friends and I died at the bottom of a cliff not only to save his daughter but also to save the rest of us too. I suppose forgiveness was a hard stage to come to terms with. Knowing there was a place in my heart that forgave.
My uncle I just met dying after accomplishing what he and my mother started, after dragging us through hell and putting our lives in danger was easier.
My brother dying in my arms after I just got him back was both the easiest and the hardest. Because not only did I forgive him but I had to forgive myself too.
I suppose we all process grief differently. ....
AJ stared at the computer in front of her with annoyance. She made a sound of frustration, her fingers backspacing on the keyboard. She grabbed her drink from next to the laptop and took a long sip.
"That's going to drive you crazy AJ" Pope leaned over, realizing the girl wasn't studying but instead rewriting her admissions essay.
"It's not right, I need to fix it" AJ pointed out, moving the laptop so he could see the screen. "see, this whole part needs to be rewritten. This essay paired with my grades, I mean I'm never going to make it in" She shared a look with the boy and he shook his head.
Pope stood, standing behind her chair and resting his hands on her shoulders. "it's gonna be fine, you'll get in." He reassured her and she tilted her head back to look up at him.
YOU ARE READING
SWEET NICOTINE | pope heyward
FanfictionIN WHICH after a storm of chaos tears through a teenage girl's life she follows the treasure hunt her mother started. (...pope heyward x fem oc) (... outerbanks, season two and three) ©appetenxe 2023