Unfortunate Reality || Ranboo ✔️

eleven :(

Sobriety - Jessie Murph

"Where's Selene?" I asked as I walked into the house. I slipped off my shoes and took off my hat.

"Laid down in her crib. You'll be sleeping in the basement tonight with everyone. I'm sleeping in your room with the kids and I'll be awake if you need anything." He said, kissing my head and waving me off to go downstairs. I led Carter downstairs where there was a pile of blankets all spread over the floor with pillows lined up everywhere and fairy lights that were not there before hanging on the walls.

Before I could think about anything, I ran back up the stairs and hugged the life out of my uncle. I hadn't actually properly done that since he's gotten back. Not with genuine appreciation at least and he's known it too.

"I love you so much." I whispered, hugging him closer to me.

"I love you too, Star. Now go downstairs." He said, pulling away and pushing my head away with a smile. I ran back down the stairs and saw my bag across the room. I quickly searched for clothes and when I found a hoodie and sweats I walked to the bathroom to change. I came out and Carter just stared at me.

"What? Do I look bad or something?" I asked, staring at him as I asked.

"No, no you're fine." He said, quickly looking away and going on his phone. I made an instagram post and sat down next to him.

"Is it gonna be awkward?" He asked, looking back at me.

"I don't think so, why?" I asked, feeling the urge to get high all of a sudden. I may not be sober from alcohol for a week, but I was from weed and the urge was growing stronger every minute that I wasn't taking care of those kids.

"I dunno, just feels like it."

"Feel awkward?"

kill me now I hate this let me get fucking high

"I mean kinda. We just like, screamed songs at one another and then screamed at each other in the car and then talked about everything that happened in the last year. It feels kinda awkward."

"Awkward or surreal?"

"Not sure to be honest."

"Breaking the tension?" Tommy asked, walking into the room. He immediately stopped when he saw my hoodie.

"What is wrong with what I'm wearing? Jesus, it's like you've seen a ghost."

"Maybe because you're wearing Ranboo's hoodie." Tommy shrugged, plopping down on the other couch.

"It's kinda the only hoodie I wear." I responded. It's not, I just have to play off the embarrassment.

"Really?" Carter asked.

"Uh, yeah?"

not going good I'm already lying to him
I mean technically it's not a complete lie right?

it is like one of the only hoodies I wear
the only other one I wear belongs to my uncle
and other than that it's the one Izzy sent me for my birthday

"Let's change and then what?" Izzy asked, dropping her bag to the floor and rummaging through it before pushing it out of the way and going through Tommy's instead.

"Yes queen, take his clothes like you own them." I said with a laugh.

"What's mine is hers I guess." He shrugged, "I packed enough for the both of us because I knew this would happen."

"When he's self aware that his clothes are just better looking on me."

"Hey! I never said that!" He exclaimed, looking at her in shock.

"Personally, I think Jack's clothes look best on me." Kai said, shrugging as she pulled out clothes from her bag. "But I also look so good in my own, so."

"Yes queen! Know you're that bitch!" I yelled again, laughing at my own words.

"I say we play some games as a group? We haven't all been together like this so."

"I'm down! I just have to let the dogs out really quick." I said, checking my phone as if I had a message. I grabbed my bag and walked upstairs.

"Why do you need your bag?" Carter asked, looking at me like he knew.

"Dog leads are in here." I said, trying to keep the annoyance from my voice. I continued my trek up the stairs and out the front door. I walked down the street and into a darkened alleyway. Once I was securely hidden from the street, I sat on the ground and pulled everything I needed from my bag.

Weed, check

Bowl, check

Lighter, check

I packed the bowl with whatever amount of weed I had left from the party I went to and lit it once I was ready. The first inhale burned my throat and lungs. They were screaming at me to stop, to turn back, to breathe in normal air. I just couldn't bring myself to. Not after being within the same proximity as Xavier fucking Carter for half of the night.

We may be re-running things, but it doesn't change how I felt and how I still feel.

I finished the bowl with one last hit before cleaning out the bowl of the burnt weed. I slipped it back in my bag and pulled out my perfume, trying my best to mask the smell.

I walked back into the house and I was so thankful nobody was upstairs. When I went downstairs though, everybody was sat on the couches staring at me.

I was fucked