십오 : Amour Propre

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Hae-Yeon

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Hae-Yeon

 
“List out three things that I’m good at or that which I like doing?” I laugh softly as I glance at the letter in my hand. “That’s not too difficult, I guess,” I pick up a sticky note from my desk and sit down on the chair.

“Okay, here goes,” whispering to myself, I begin jotting down the three things which I’m good at.

1.       Photography

2.       Embroidering

3.       Baking

Taking my lower lip between my teeth along with the tip of the pencil, I wonder why he told me to write down just three things which I feel I might be good at because I suddenly feel like writing down a few more things like babysitting, scrapbooking, doodling and de-cluttering. But I also laugh a little to myself when I think about the ridiculous list in my mind, and I feel that it’s good that he asked me to write down just three because what is even babysitting? Where do I go and find a baby to take care of if that was even on my list?

Out of the three things, my mind unmistakably leans towards photography as the skill that I’m best at, and I decide to do just that. Well, Jake was so right when he said that it could even be something that I do every day, yet something for which I have never made time to appreciate myself.

Right now, I’m at home, dressed in my ratty old pajamas and curled up on my chair, and it is raining cats and dogs outside. So, going out to click pictures is out of the question. But I do have a whole drive’s worth of photos clicked by me, and I have made up my mind that I would choose one among those pictures for today’s challenge.

Powering up my laptop, I click open the folder that contains the photos from the shoots conducted this month, organized into respective sub-folders. As I scroll past them, I click open a few and study the images before I open up the photos from Taehyung’s friend’s shoot—the one with him and his little daughter.

A smile pulls at the corners of my lips as I click on one of the pictures and move past them, one by one, until I reach the picture with Jungkook laying on the couch with a sleepy Haewon resting blissfully on his sturdy, bare chest. There are more than ten photos in this frame and set-up, but this one is my favorite as it shows his face as well.

I tilt my head a little, aligning my face in the same direction as his while my eyes drink in the beauty of the image, keenly studying every little detail on the man in the picture—the way his closed eyes are giving off a heavenly vibe not just to the picture but to my entire room as well, and the way his pretty features are all frozen on the frame where I can just keep admiring them for as long as I want.

I now notice the little beauty mark that’s below his lower lip and the way his upper lip is slimmer compared to his fuller lower lip, and there’s also a little scar on his left cheek that I hadn’t even noticed until now. There are lots of other little beauty marks as well that are adorning his face and neck, and my fingers decide on their own to zoom in on the scar and then carefully break down every detail on his magnified face that’s occupying the totality of my laptop’s screen at the moment.

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