I Would Have

Narcissist

Song for this Chapter: 
Narcissist- Lauren Spencer-Smith

"So if you're feeling crazy, I wouldn't be surprised
The only thing they're good at's knowing how to gaslight
Then make you feel like you're the most beautiful in the world
While they're sleeping with another girl."

*Ryot*

He watches her walk away, arms pressed tightly to her abdomen, fighting tears, judging by the slight shake in her shoulders. 

Her words replay in his head. 

You got your wish. You didn't just hurt me. You ruined me. 
You didn't just hurt me. 
You ruined me. 

He turns and climbs back into his truck, risking looking back to see her dart from the door and over to a white bike parked beside the building. She's pulled on a pair of armored jeans, keeping her hoodie, and a pair of riding boots. She's quick to pull her hair back into a low, tight bun, before yanking on a blue helmet. He can vaguely make out a design on the sides. 

Ryot tries to will his foot to push the gas, to go, to leave. His foot doesn't respond. He's forced to watch as she messes with her phone, shoving it into her jacket. When her hand slips up to the system on the side, he realizes she was starting her music. She starts her bike and pulls forward, flipping her visor up as she crawls across the loose gravel. Her movements are gentle, steady, as she moves around him. She looks both ways, finally noticing him. Her eyes are red, and she looks as shocked as he feels. Pulling into traffic, she twists the throttle, redlining her bike down main street as she heads for the highway. At the last minute, she flips her visor down, before opening the bike up further. 

He can't move until she's gone, disappeared from view. He follows her path, turning against traffic to get in the correct lane. His chest is tight, aching, and he finds that it's difficult to keep his eyes on the road. She was all too eager to get away, and even now, he had an idea of where she was going. Granting her her wish, he gives her space, leaving her alone, as he goes back to Bella's to face the consequences of his actions. 

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*Isadora* 

For the first time today, her chest lightens up as she twists on the throttle. Her 400 won't get her to the speeds she wants, but it'll do. She navigates the busy highway, passing cars so fast they appear to be standing still. Her mind is clouded, jumbled, when she reaches the stoplights signaling she's halfway to her destination. There was one place she went when her mind was this loud and her dogs were unavailable. 

The light turns green, and she pauses to change the song before putting the bike into gear and rolling the throttle. A quick glance confirms no patrol cars around. Police were always on the lookout for bikes. Always. With her luck today, she'd end up getting pulled over. The backroad is deserted, save for an elderly woman in her newer Escape. Still, she forces herself to do the speed limit, slowing even further when she reaches the familiar rusted white gates. Her tires crunch on the gravel as she rounds the bend, stopping and parking at the row she's come to recognize from even as far out as the road. 

Her boots brush the grass as she walks the ten yards and sits in front of the four all-too-familiar stones. 

"Hey, y'all." Her father's parents, and one of his brothers and his youngest sister were here. Their gravestones brought her comfort, making her feel far less alone. She sucks in a shaky breath. 

"Ryot came back, but I'm assuming you already knew that. He says he didn't mean to hurt me. Can you believe that? I'm fairly certain he meant to, honestly. There's no other explanation for it. I can't trust him anymore, can't see him, can't ride with him, can't talk to him." She pauses to breathe, the trees pushing a soft, warm breeze. It envelops her. For a moment, her chest eases. She feels calmer, at peace.