It's Playtime: A Playtime With Percy Fanfiction

Chapter Nine: A Final Few Regrets

      The day drones. I can't stop thinking about the call. I can't stop thinking about how I'll never be able to see any of my family again. I can't stop thinking about how I'll most likely die here.
I can't stop thinking.
I'll be here.
Alone.
Cold.
Hungry.
      I've become accustomed to Pal's stupid tasks. I know immediately the route to each maze game. I know the matches to each of the shapes. I know how to spam the water button for the annoying water game.
Is this really all I'm good for now? Satisfying some needy, obsessive, downright psychopathic children's toy? The answer "yes" springs into my head. It is, isn't it? I don't care that I've gone all "Boo hoo my life is sooo miserable oh woe is me", I'M NEVER GOING TO BE ABLE TO SEE ANYONE I LOVE EVER AGAIN, I DON'T CARE HOW LOW I'VE STUPED, I DON'T CARE, I DON'T CARE.
I JUST DON'T CARE ANYMORE.
IT'S NOT LIKE ANYONE'S GONNA SEE ME
JUST SHUT UP YOU HAVE NO IDEA WHAT IT'S LIKE TO LOSE EVERYTHING.
      I have a headache now. Great. Just what I need. I laugh at myself, tears spring into my eyes. I never thought that I'd understand people who argued with themselves, but now I know. I keep getting upset nowadays. I keep crying now. I guess ever since that call, death's all I've been thinking about. I ran out of bottled water two days ago. I really am going to die here, aren't I? I don't know what's going to happen after this life, but I hope it's somewhere nice.
Ha, even I don't believe that.
Once you're dead, that's it.
That's the way I see it.
My father used to tell me I was a cynical man back when I was 6. I'm pretty sure he was joking though. I feel my eyes slowly starting to close. Pal knows this moment, when I'm about to fall asleep. He starts beeping at me to wake up. I flinch, my eyes wide open. I stare at Pal frowning. I wish he was dead.
After the call, when I had fallen asleep, telling him to die, he was never the same after that. It's almost as if he's become just a tiny bit crueler, locking me up inside of rooms sometimes just for the laughs, and mocking me constantly, all the while telling me how much he needs me to survive. It's so weird. I'm glad he depends on me to survive.
It'll hurt him all the more when I die.
I'm happy that it'll hurt him.
      I have dreams where I escape sometimes, although they're called "dreams" for a reason. It'll most likely never happen. I'll never escape this mightmare alive. Wait. Have I heard that before?
I recall my dream from about a week or two ago.
"The nightmare only ends when you wake up."
A quote from "Pal". I wish I had more meaningful dreams like that, where you got a healthy dose of indirect imagery and creep factor. I've tried deciphering that dream before though. Especially that thing Pal told me at the end of it. My first thought was just taking it literally, as in literally waking up from a nightmare. Then, I thought about something else. Something I've been thinking about for all the time I've been here.
Dying.
Letting Pal kill me.
This "nightmare" I'm in will never end, unless I die, which seems like the equivalent of "waking up". Today's probably the last day I'll ever see Pal again. My last day on Earth. It's weird, thinking about it now. When I was younger, an image would pop up into my mind when I thought about the future. 47 year old me, sitting at a wooden desk on a May afternoon in my moderately sized house, working on an animatronic for a project, proud that I was an employee at Jim Henson's Creature Shop.
I never would've thought that I'd die this soon.
I guess in these circumstances it's kind of inevitable.
I'll die here one way or another.
Might as well die on my terms.
      At around 10:35 pm, I stop whatever meaningless task I'm doing on Pal. I drop him, and relax, closing my eyes as I sit on my armchair. "NICK! You DROPPED me!" Pal yells. I ignore him, sleeping a good 15 minutes for the first time in forever. "Nick?" Pal asks. "NICK WAKE UP!" I pretend that I don't hear him. It's been so long since I've been able to rest like this, you have no idea what this is like.
      I slowly open my eyes, then walk up to my room, ignoring Pal. I slam the door shut, and lay on my bed, legs crossed. I know he'll get in here through the vent, but I don't care. I just want to be able to sleep in my bed for the last time. Slowly but surely, I hear Pal furiously muttering inside of the vent next to my bed.
      Finally, he busts the vent hatch open.
"Why are you IGNORING me NICK??" He demands to know the answer, but I won't give him the satisfaction of getting his way through intimidation. I got nothing left to lose anyways. I roll over my bed, blanket over my body in response. I feel like a child sulking in their room.
      Only the resentment goes far deeper than not getting a toy they've asked for. Pal grumbles. "STOP DOING THAT AND LOOK AT ME!" He screams.
I don't care, man.
Like, seriously, just shut up.
      Suddenly, I feel wires drag me out of bed forcefully and slam me onto the ground. I'm not surprised that he's resorted to this tactic. I stay at Pal from the ground, trying my hardest not to look scared, but rather bored. I don't want to give him that satisfaction either.
"Why are you DOING this!?" Pal asks, infuriated. I don't say anything and I look away. I like giving him the silent treatment.
It makes him mad when he doesn't get any attention. "UGHHHH." Pal groans. The same wires holding me down string me up, eerily enough, like a puppet. It's then when I realize that this is what was supposed to happen when I was still trapped in Percy's Playhouse. I don't struggle through the wires though. I'm too tired to. I didn't really think I was going to live anyways. "Nick, I SWEAR, if you don't stop this... Whatever you're doing, I WILL END THIS FRIENDSHIP MYSELF JUST LIKE I WAS SUPPOSED TO." Pal threatens. I stay quiet, until I decide to say something. "I give up Pal." I whisper, tired. Pal's anger immediately melts away.
"Huh?"
"You win. End me. I dare you." I say.
He looks surprised. He wasn't expecting this, was he? He squints. "Really?" He says, expecting a reaction. Nothing. "Well then, guess I'll have to if my BEST PAL insists! How could I object?" All of a sudden, all of his creations show up behind him, slamming the door wide open.
      Well, this was truly the end. One tiny little favor for the boss led to this very moment right now. This wasn't the way I expected to go out, to be honest, being killed by a sentient Tamagotchi inside of my bedroom. The wires around me got tighter and tighter. Pal's creations start to slowly surround me. I'm sure that was an intentional move meant to scare me. And it's working.
I'm gonna miss them when I die.
------ and ----.
My parents.
The boss.
I didn't even get to pay that guy his 20 dollars. I wish I had rather than just procrastinating. I can't say this was the most fufilling life I've ever had, but it was what I got. If I hadn't chosen this job, I'm sure I would've been perfectly happy. But, I did. I regret every moment of it. Maybe if I was stronger I wouldn't be in this situation. Maybe if I were smarter too. Or maybe this was just how my end was always going to be, no matter what I did.
Even so, I just wish it didn't have to be this way.
      The creatures lunge towards me, similar to how the corrupted Percy Poodle animatronic did in my dream. I can feel one of them slicing at my neck, another at my stomach, and another stabbing me through the chest with a wire.
I feel the blood seep in, and so do all of my regrets.

[END (Nick's POV)]