An eye-opening journey that will change your life forever. Do you ever wonder why you always tend to attract negativity towards you or why things never work out for you? Throughout this journey, you'll find the answers to your questions and much mor...
"The psychological rule says that when an inner situation is not made conscious, it happens outside as fate. That is to say, when the individual remains undivided and does not become conscious of his inner opposite, the world must perforce act out the conflict and be torn into opposing halves."
– Carl Jung
A psychiatrist and psychoanalyst named Carl Jung believed that we have two sides that need to become whole within us. There is the conscious and the unconscious. The conscious are the pieces of yourself that you think are good and acceptable. The unconscious are the parts that you think are bad and unacceptable. This is why we often suppress the unconscious and create what Carl Jung called 'the shadow' or the ego ideal.
The Shadow Side: Your shadow side is the collection of suppressed, repressed, or disowned aspects of your personality. It's the mirror reflecting facets of yourself that society, upbringing, or personal judgment deems unacceptable. These elements may include unresolved traumas, unacknowledged desires, or traits perceived as negative. This is the part that tells you that something is wrong and that you're incomplete. Jung referred to the shadow as "the thing a person had wish to be".
Identification and Integration: Acknowledging your shadow side involves a courageous journey of self-discovery. It requires facing the discomfort of recognizing traits within yourself that may not align with your self-image. It encourages self-reflection and introspection to better understand our own emotions and reactions. The process of integration involves embracing these aspects with compassion, understanding, and a commitment to personal growth. To recognize the shadow we can start by seeing it in others. This is where many say 'What we don't like in others is what we don't like in us'. Many times it's something we still need to heal within ourselves. Our reactions can also provide insight into our insecurities, fears, or unresolved issues. For instance, have you ever seen someone so calm and then out of nowhere blowup due to emotional triggers? This is someone who has a big shadow. This can be because of guilt, shame, or pain. This is why it is always so important to do shadow work. To find the root of what is causing the 'shadow'.
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The key to shadow work is first being aware of the shadow side. There is not a person on Earth who doesn't have a shadow side. It's all part of being human. Some choose to face their shadow side while others choose to ignore it. Second, we have to accept it. Bringing it into the light to become conscious of it. Allowing the foundation of this shadow to come to light. The more darkness we bring into light, the more we start aligning with our true essence. It is said that we can't reach our full potential unless the shadow is integrated into our personality or we become one with it.
For example, say I am in a toxic relationship and I know deep inside that this relationship isn't good for me. I know that if I leave I'll be happier and there will be more growth for me. But I choose to stay in this relationship because I don't want to face my shadow. In this case, my shadow would be a fear of being alone or fear of abandonment. Choosing not to face my shadow of feeling alone closes opportunities for me to grow as well as still being in a toxic relationship. Instead, I could be facing my shadow and become aware of the root of this so my life could grow and shape to where I want to be.
The shadow side is not a realm to be feared but a treasure trove of self-discovery. By confronting, embracing, and integrating the shadows, we unlock the wisdom hidden within. So, when you dive into this journey – both on a personal and spiritual level – it helps you live a more real and kind-hearted life, recognizing all the ups and downs of being human. The shadows, once illuminated, guide us towards the realization that, in the dance between light and dark, we find the true essence of our being.
31 Day Shadow Questions for Journaling:
1. What are some repressed feelings you believe you have, and how do they show up for you?
2. What do you believe are some of your best traits?
3. What do you believe are some of your worst traits?
4. What's a trait in others that you wish you had?
5. What's one thing you're afraid of doing, and why?
6. What makes you jealous, and why?
7. What triggers you, and why?
8. Describe a time you self-sabotaged. Why do you think you did it?
9. What fears or anxieties do you often try to avoid or deny within yourself?
10. Can you identify recurring patterns or negative behaviors in your life, and what might be their root cause?
11. How do you react when faced with criticism or feedback that hits a nerve?
12. Are there aspects of your personality that you feel uncomfortable acknowledging or expressing?
13. What childhood experiences or traumas may have influenced your current belief system and behaviors?
14. Do you notice any self-sabotaging behaviors when you're on the brink of success or happiness?
15. Are there relationships in your life where you consistently project negative emotions or expectations?
16. What are your deepest insecurities, and how do they impact your decisions and actions?
17. In what situations do you feel a sense of unworthiness or a fear of not being "good enough"?
18. Can you recall instances where you suppressed your emotions or desires to conform to societal expectations?
19. How do you react to situations that challenge your sense of control or authority?
20. Are there parts of your identity or past experiences that you've intentionally hidden from others?
21. What roles or masks do you wear in different aspects of your life, and why?
22. How do you handle moments of solitude or silence? What thoughts or emotions surface?
23. Are there recurring dreams or nightmares that might offer insights into your subconscious fears?
24. How does your self-talk influence your mood and actions, especially during challenging times?
25. Can you pinpoint moments in your life where you felt shame, and how has it impacted you since?
26. What desires or needs do you judge as inappropriate or unacceptable within yourself?
27. When do you find yourself blaming external circumstances for your challenges rather than taking responsibility?
28. How does your past conditioning or cultural influences affect your beliefs about success, love, and happiness?
29. Are there areas of your life where you struggle to set boundaries, and why?
30. How do you cope with rejection, and what does it reveal about your fear of not being accepted?
31. Can you identify any unresolved conflicts or unexpressed emotions with people in your life?
