A day In My life

6th August 2023- Facing The situation I avoided

Hi, this is me again! your girl!

Starting with the study talks, the mid-term is about to start on the 8 of this month and I suck at studying. There is nothing like 2 years back from now. My graph has fallen very badly to the ground even now, it is in the grave. My elder sister moved out a few months back and my younger sister is left to hang out with. let's get straight to the main motive of this entry....

Let's say this is an UPDATE to the previous stories!

So I have been talking to that guy for months after apologizing and treating him with ice cream, chocolates, candies, kindness, jokes, and of course my rants. He treats me nice and I treat him nice too. he helped me with the projects. and shared his notes too. Yeah, he's good with me. But the fact that I didn't inform my friends that time though coz I didn't want to bring that situation up here again and go through the same downfall I avoided mentioning his name or everything he was involved with me to my friends. And things were going well until 2 days back. 

One of my got to know about me talking to him again.  I told her not to mention this again in front of anyone. She did that. She exposed me. And I'm now doomed. 

in the group chat of 4 of us. 2 of my friends again started cussing him and making me understand to stay away from him. I didn't stated anything. but then they said I started this over again this time and  I intentionally didn't want to understand them.

Bruhhh FR FR. I'm tired of this again and again. they didn't want to understand my POV and wanted me to understand them. just for 1 second why can't you believe me what I'm saying or what I'm trying to do just for the sake of us? I tried not to mention him and you all are blaming me that I hid things with you.. even this was not enough they tried to put all the blame on me for starting this thing and all of that. They don't trust me anymore and want me to trust them. WHY?

Group chats weren't enough to DM me personally to not run away and face it......Like for what? Why would I give you an explanation about whom I talk to or what I do? And I cried coz they're my best friends and don't trust me. Don't believe my words. My face swelled up. I blocked one of my closest friend who started and blamed me actually and for all the past stuffs for which she considered I was wrong all the time and blocked me didn't even looked at me or talked to me for about weeks and ignored me Tf out of which. I left the group chat. 

Here's the things for which I blocked her

~she made things out which was supposed to be between us

~her changed behavior towards me

~she doesn't trust me

~she ones told DONOT MENTION HIS NAME INFRONT OF AGAIN. I did the same and she blamed me for hiding the things with her.

~she had always blamed me for the things which maybe I did wrong and I deserved it maybe and at some point t had apologized not directly but ofc indirectly. I have been blocked and ignored for months but anyways I had tried to start the conversation. she never the same with me. 

~she thinks she's the only one to get hurt. I don't have a feelings 

~ she blocked me when i was expecting an apology from her. I initiated the convo and got rude replies. this time when i blocked her she removed me from her snapchat and ours 400 streak is now gone to air.

~ i called her my best friend and didn't expected from her to do this.

NOTE FOR MY BEST FRIENDS :

I am feeling hurt and that's why I hesitated to share this with you. I wanted to avoid any complications. I have been trying to keep him in my life for the past few months, but only on my own terms. I'm speaking to him because I choose to, not because I am being influenced or defending him. If there are any consequences in the future, I will face them and not boast about them to you. I am not dumb enough as y'all think so. I appreciate your concern for me but y'all would have atleast tried to understand me too.

                                                 ~NABI signing off with swelled up lips and eyes

                                                                                         13:50 pm