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shaad had left this morning to go make his plays but he said he was going to be back later.
i couldn't help but feel bad about myself. yes it felt right but now i'm kinda regretting it. a nigga i barely knew just took my virginity; who's to say he not just gonna dub me?
but the moment just felt right. i been played with before but never have i ever wanted to have sex. not until shaad. and that shit felt so good. i been having flashbacks throughout the day.
i wasn't gonna tell anyone about it, not even icelyn. i wanted this to be me and shaad's little thing before we made shit exclusive. if, that is.
he was sayin all the right things but that's the thing with men. they love to lie especially to get what they want.
but i did like him. i'm just worried that things might be going to fast and then he'll get bored of me quick.
i shifted my thoughts to the food i was eating as i kicked my legs. this shit was too good.
i been chilling all day just ignoring the whole world and doing me. i was thinking about doing some shopping but i was too lazy to go out so i just ordered online.
shaad: wyd?
i looked at my phone and put it back down. i didn't know how to respond. i was scared to say the wrong thing incase he dubs me for real.
me: eatin wby
shaad: bout to get sum to eat rn u good?
me: yea why wouldn't i be?
shaad: just checkin
i didn't know what to say after that but i did want to keep the conversation going. to see if he was really interested in me.
shaad incoming facetime call...
i answered and sat my phone up as i watched him walk into a shop. he looked down at the camera and smirked before resting his arms on the counter.
"lemme get oxtail with rice and peas," he said, "and some mac n cheese,"
i just know he not at the caribbean shop resting his arms on that lady counter.
"you want somethin from here?" he asked me and i shook my head no.
"you sure? cos i know how females love pickin off a nigga plate,"
"i'm sure," i let out a small laugh, "i got some food,"
