I Saved My Heroes (Fifth Harmony/You)

Chapter Fourteen

Your P.O.V.

"You're all set Ms. Y/LN, you can now go back to being a normal teenager." My male doctor joked placing the last stitch in a metal container.

"I wish." I whispered so no one could hear. I'm never gonna be that normal teenager again, no matter how much I wanted to.

"Well meet me at the front desk, I need you to sign some things before you leave."

"Okay thank you, could you give us a moment though." My mom said and the doctor nodded before exiting the room.

"How does it feel?" She asked.

"Good." I said running my fingers over the scar that runs under my bellybutton. It brought back memories. The same memories that haunt my dreams, but this time it felt less real since I wasn't closing my eyes. The room was quiet in my mom's ears but in mine, the screams and the bang of the gun firing filled the room. The silent room became the loudest.

"Are you okay mija? I know some of this will remind you of that night and I don't want you being scared and all. I know you can't sleep at night still so I don't want this to make it worse." I giggled at my mom's blabbing.

"I'm fine, Its a 'me' thing, and hopefully the therapist can help me." I said and my mom nodded.

"I wish I could help you." my mom said in a sadden tone.

"Trust me, if I had to choose between you or the therapist. I'd choose you." I said trying to lighten up her mood, and luckily it did.

"Well the girls had already arranged for you to see her in a few so, lets go." My mom smiled and I walked out the room with her.

Walking around felt different with the stitches out. No stitch rubbing against my skin every time I moved. I felt more relaxed now that I was half way there to being 'me' again. I'm just hoping that therapist can help me with the other half.

After my mom had signed the papers we headed to my mom's car. We started heading to the therapist since it was 11:30.

"Mom?" I asked once we pulled into a parking lot outside the building. She seemed on edge, what for?

"Yes sweet heart?"

"Are you okay?" I asked placing my hand on her shoulder. I noticed it was the first time I had asked her that in a while.

"No, i'm not." she sobbed out. It broke my heart to see her like this.

"I almost lost my baby, I still can't believe I let that happen to you. I should of went with you to the hospital that day, be there with you, protect you." I started feeling myself begin to cry. I wanted to tell her it wasn't her fault, I wanted to tell her she didn't need to protect me but what good would that do? Simple words wouldn't change her mind. You can't change someones mind once its made up already. So I just hugged her, I put every positive emotion into this hug, love, care, kindness, and even some sadness because I wanted her to know it wasn't her fault. If not physically then mentally.

After a few minutes of my mom in my arms sobbing, I pulled away and wiped my tears.

"We have to go in mom." I said and she nodded her head opening her door.

As we entered the doors I was instantly hit with the scent of roses and daises. It reminded me of the garden I used to run around in at the park.

"Ah Y/N right?" A lady said walking up to me and my mother before we could go to the front desk. She was wearing a white collared shirt along with a white pencil skirt.

"Yeah, thats me." I said shaking her extended hand. I was scared, how was I supposed to tell all my secrets to a stranger?

"I was just about to walk to my office and set everything up but since you're here already why don't you come with me? Oh i'm Gloria by the way." She said pulling me away from my mom.

"Bye mom, i love you." I said before being separated from her by a closed door.

"Take a seat." Gloria said pointing at a couch across from her chair. Once I sat down I felt surprisingly comfortable, my tenseness faded.

"Just relax, tell me whats been on your mind." She started.

"Uh, well I've been going through recovery for-"

"No Y/N, tell me whats really been on your mind." my eyes widened once she said that. It was like she saw right through me, knew when I was lying.

"Uh, I can't." I said closing my eyes so hopefully she doesn't have power over me.

"Y/N, please look at me." she spoke up. I sighed knowing I wasn't going to win, so I slowly raised my head and looked at her. Her face softened, she was reading me with a simple look. Damn, she is good at her job.

"Tell me whats on your mind at this moment." She said softly, looking straight into my eyes.

"V-V-Vico." I got out looking down at my fingers as she studied me more.

"Who is he?" She asked.

"My mom's ex husband's son." I said fighting back the tears that we so eager to slip out.

"And what did Vico do to you?"

"He- I can't, please." I begged. I hated talking about him, so much.

"I can't help you If you don't talk to me." Gloria stated. She was right, i wanted her help, I needed her help. I took a deep breath before continuing.

"He t-touched me." I mumbled not certain if she heard.

"What?" She asked obviously not hearing me.

"He raped me!" I shouted, and with that my heart broke. Every piece of scraps i was holding onto fell. With myself finally admitting he had raped me hurt. I just believe he loved me, that he was teaching another 'lessons' of the real world.

"Y/N." Gloria paused for a second to earn my attention. "You can't let him have that power over you, and when I say power i mean mental power. He has cut you so deep that he left a scar, but you have the choice to be affected by it or ignore it. You have paths, good and bad, from what I see you're choosing the wrong path."

"What if I don't know which path to choose?" I asked.

"Then make your own path with your own methods, your own ways, your own choices." She was right, hell, she was fucking right. I was so surprised that someone could give such good advice.

"To what end?" I asked.

"Thats for you to find out." She smiled.

"What if I don't want to find out."

"Make yourself want to, because you never know, it could end up helping you in ways you never thought possible."

"But the memory of Vico-"

"Will always be there, but you can't let him have the laugh of knowing he haunts you. Prove to him you're fine, that you're stronger than he will ever know. In the end, you find yourself laughing now, laughing because he doesn't affect you anymore. Don't give him any glory." She explained. She was right, I don't know how many times I will say that but, she was right. I had always gave him the power, the glory, and never took any of my own. I don't regret coming here, Gloria may have just solved ONE of my problems in one visit.
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"Hey Y/N, how was the therapist?" Lauren asked through the facetime call.

"Amazing, she knows exactly what to say. Thank you for arranging the visit, she really helped me." I said to the five girls on my phone screen.

"Damn, one visit and I feel we have that girl we met at the ice cream shop back." Dinah said and my palms went sweaty of the brought up topic. Flashbacks started popping in my head again making my vision go blurry from the head ache. It was all happening too fast.

"Y/N are you okay?" Ally asked noticing my change in character.

"Y-yeah just tired, I got to go, goodnight." I said before ending the call and falling back onto my bed.

"Why wont you go away?" I said as if I were talking to the memories.

"Leave me alone, just fucking leave me alone, I just want to be happy for once."