𓆸
It's hard to believe that I am lovable.
"I think you are."
I know you do -
I just find it hard to believe.
I'm sorry.
𓇢𓆸
To my dear journal,
At this moment, I am unfortunately insecure towards how I see myself. I have always told others that "nobody is unlovable". And it is true! There is someone, somebody, and something out there that just loves you. If you see beauty in the sky. If you find tiny or large flowers pretty. If you are taking care of a cat, dog, or any pet and they are a part of your life, just as they are a part of yours. It is a reflection of you. Just like the sky that you find beautiful, you are just as beautiful. If you find flowers growing pretty, you are just as pretty. What you find good and the beauty in nature or within this world, that is the reflection of how the world sees you too. And I know that I am loved.
To be taken cared for by my grandparents and uncle throughout childhood, I know that I am loved. I guess it's hard to believe that anybody loves me now, because the people I grew up with are gone; it feels weird now that they are gone. Love is given to you, and it stays with you forever. Those same people gave me endless love. And in turn, I have so much love in me that I sometimes have no idea what to do.
Despite reassuring and giving advice to others, (funnily enough) I don't seem to take the same notes for myself. Something within me can't seem to believe it, when it comes to my life. I don't know whether it is because of my strong self-critical nature. I know I tend to be too hard on myself, so I end up being a bit too "uptight". I guess maybe that is why I find it difficult to believe that I am lovable. I feel guilty that this is how I feel about myself. Guilty because I was given so much adoration and care, yet this is how I feel about myself.
Sincerely, a guilty girl who feels unlovable.
YOU ARE READING
a girl's scattered journal.
Poetry"I'm overthinking again, aren't I?" A journal of a girl who's trying to clear her mind. A collection of thoughts, opinions, and whatnot. Filled with messy thoughts that weigh her shoulders down. You'll be delving into a scattered journal of what p...
