𓆸
To my unrequited,
Have you ever sat there and found yourself staring at a corner of your room? Or lay on your bed and stare at the ceiling? And think of me. Tell me. At least once or twice, during your time with me. Have you?
There must be at least one moment,
that you have...
𓇢𓆸
To my dear journal,
Rather, this is more of an unsent letter. I have many but little things to say to him. So many thoughts. Yet, my mouth can't muster up any words to speak out. I guess I am confused more than anything on what to feel completely. One thing that has been running around my mind lately was that question. I have been wondering if somewhere, along the lines, of when we first met and began talking that you've thought of me. Whether you started daydreaming, then you find yourself staring at a random corner of the room. Whether you laid down on your bed and started thinking of me while staring at the ceiling with a smile. Maybe it's just me. It would be nice if you have. So I would know that somewhere, along the lines, that what I felt was mutual with you.
Knowing the answer won't change anything of the present. I guess it's for the sake of my heart. To know that it wasn't just me, who felt something between us. Even if it was a speck of a crush. Or that you found me cute, pretty, or beautiful. Or any form of feeling that you "liked" me too.
Another reason why this will forever be an unsent letter is because deep down, I have romanticized you. I've put you on a pedestal; I made you special in my eyes. And realistically, you probably didn't really feel anything. Though, I wanted to be "optimistic," and nothing is really wrong to think that you might have "liked" me in some way.
I mean, somewhere, along the lines, the way you acted and the way you talked to me; it's hard to fake something so genuine. Things changed, and when it comes to me, people's feelings change. I know that. I know that you had a crush on me at some point. Maybe I'm delusional. Maybe I might be right. Who knows. It's my thoughts giving me answers I couldn't receive. For now, I'll just let my heart love endlessly. It won't back down from unrequited experiences like this.
Sincerely, a girl with an unrequited crush.
YOU ARE READING
a girl's scattered journal.
Poetry"I'm overthinking again, aren't I?" A journal of a girl who's trying to clear her mind. A collection of thoughts, opinions, and whatnot. Filled with messy thoughts that weigh her shoulders down. You'll be delving into a scattered journal of what p...
