Vices & virtues // Bucky Barnes

XIII

It turned into something bigger

Somewhere in the haze, got a sense I'd been betrayed

Your finger on my hair pin triggers

Soldier down on that icy ground

~Taylor Swift, The Great War

   I noticed a slight change in James' behaviour. The way he lightened up seeing me, the way he kissed me goodnight and in the morning, the way his hand searched for mine. We hung around a lot, as we used to do before, but it was different now: more subtle, closer, warmer. Sweet dates around the city, holding hands and stealing kisses. Having sex, a lot of. Waking up in his arms. Listening about his company and getting into it. Him asking if I could read in French to him. Me agreeing. Going out with the boys and Wanda. Inviting Natasha and Loki for double dates. Him humming my music as I get ready, me swaying with him to 40's jazz. If I wouldn't be so paranoid and suspicious due to the brainwashing that Zemo tried to perform on me, I would've thought Bucky Barnes has fallen for me, especially when I found him rearranging my bedroom with the manor staff and casually informing me that we are both moving to the master bedroom upstairs, as if we were really engaged, as if we were planning the future together. As if it was all real.

   Yeah, I would've thought I am living in a wicked fairytale, if I hadn't come back to the Barnes Manor from dinner with Natasha and her newly adopted baby Lily and hear a voice just a little too familiar dropping my name.

- Blair will never forgive you, you know? - Steve's attitude was as cold as the ice he stirred in his glass. I furrowed my brows, moving as quiet as I could, just to take a look at the two men sharing a drink, hoping they won't notice me. - She's too stubborn, too proud, too full of her own honour, too...

- Nah. - Bucky interrupted him, brushing it off casually, as if he was talking to a friend, not his mortal enemy of choice. He sat on the chair, sided to me, still not noticing me standing just behind the door. - It's how you see her. She's completely different, Steve. Nothing like you describe her. She's fearless and much darker than you could even imagine. Fierce. Unbroken.

- She's unstoppable in her fury. Look how she reacts to me. She'll hate you as well. You know that.

- I trust my girl. I believe in her. She knows what's good for her.

- You don't know shit about her.

- Oh, I do. I know how she likes her coffee and that she's allergic to strawberries, how she prefers her martinis and how she calls my name every night under me.

   This little fucker. I'll rip his cock off.

- The fact that you seduced her...

- Seduced? - Bucky's laugh filled the room. - No, this is actually something you did. Let me remind you. You left her for dead. You abandoned her, Steve. And you know, to take her from you, it was sweet. But to have her around, under me even, seeing her fall for me more and more every day, knowing she'd never pick you again? That, my righteous friend, was delicious. Revenge tastes even better than she does.

   Even though the anger was filing my veins instead of blood, I had to admit, his choice of words was impressive. We were both dramatic in our manner of speech.

- You won't be so cocky the day she finds out, James. She'll be pissed. She'll fuck you up.

- She won't.