Black And Blue-E.Buckley (9-1-1)

TwentyThree

And they say love can hurt

But seein' her smile can get you everytime

"Good morning," Maddie greeted as she walked into the apartment.

"Morning," Eleanor smiled. "Everything is on the table, all ready for you and I am making breakfast."

"Oh, yum. Where's Buck?" Eleanor pointed toward the living room. Maddie nodded. "How is he?" She whispered.

"He seems like he's handling everything pretty well but he never wants to talk about it so."

"Hey," Buck greeted as he came into the kitchen.

"Good morning," Maddie smiled at her brother. "How are you feeling today?"

"Are you sure you wanna ask me? Or do you wanna ask El to answer for me."

"Sorry." Buck just brushed it off.

Maddie and Buck sat at the table while Eleanor cooked breakfast. Maddie was attempting to fix a pair of Buck's pants so that he could wear them with his cast. Eleanor flipped the pancakes before going to the cabinet for some plates and glasses. She added some fruit to each of the plates and poured orange juice into each of the cups.

"Hey! Whoa, whoa, whoa. Come on, be careful," Buck yelled as Maddie started to rip the pants she'd been working on. 

"Uh, were you gonna sew these two pieces back together?" Buck looked at her in shock before looking to Eleanor for help. Eleanor put her hands up in surrender, telling Buck he was on his own. "I didn't think so."

"Doesn't mean you had to rip them. That looks terrible."

"It's gonna be fine. Just tuck it in the top of your cast," Eleanor chimed in. Buck glared at her.

"I don't even know why you're going. You shouldn't be on your feet, you need to be healing." 

"Well, this is more important. If I break anything else, they can just fix that too with the other stuff," Buck shrugged.

"Wait. What other stuff?" Maddie looked between Buck and Eleanor. She was kind of scary when she was in big sister mode.

"They want him to have another surgery. Doctor wasn't happy with what he saw on the X-rays, he wants to go back in." 

"Wants to replace the rod and do some bone grafts," Buck added.

Eleanor finished putting everyone's plates together and carefully carried them over to the table. She set Buck's a little closer to the edge of the table so it was easier for him to reach. 

"Well, do they think it's a delayed union or nonunion? I mean if it's just healing slower than expected you could just wait a few weeks."

"I'm not waiting. The sooner I have the surgery, sooner I can go back to work." Buck began picking at his plate like he was done with the conversation. Maddie looked at Eleanor who just shrugged. She and Buck had already had this conversation, maybe Maddie could get a different response. Though it was doubtful. Once Buck had his mind set that was it.

"So the doctor does want you to wait. You should listen to him. We're talking about your health. Your ability to walk. We're talking about the rest of your life." Maddie tried to reason with him.

"No, being a firefighter is my life. It is the only thing I have ever done that was important and that mattered, okay? Without that, I don't have anything." Ouch. Maddie looked at Eleanor again to see her reaction to Buck's words. She was good at hiding her emotions but Maddie could tell that his words hurt her. 

"You will still be Buck, okay, and we will all love you. There are lots of other important things that you can do with your life."

"No. No, I've already made my choice." And with that Buck was done with the conversation. 

Maddie turned in her chair to face Eleanor, "I'm sorry.."

Eleanor waved her off. "It's fine, I'm used it to. He didn't mean it like that and he's not himself right now." Eleanor choked back some tears as she stood from the table and went to clean up in the kitchen.

****

"People assume we choose this life. I'm not so sure. Sometimes I think this life chooses us. For those that answer the call, there can be no doubt, no equivocation. It's not just the lives of those we serve that depend on us, but our own. The lives of our fellow firefighters and first responders. Today we welcome into those ranks a new brother. After a year of hard work and dedication. I am proud to officially declare that your probationary period is at an end. Welcome to the Los Angeles Fire Department Firefighter Diaz." Bobby ended his speech and everyone clapped. Christopher made his way to the front of the room and handed Eddie his helmet.

"Thank you sir," Eddie's smile grew as he looked at his son.

Everyone slowly got up and began to mingle. There was a line as everyone gathered to congratulate Eddie. Eleanor helped Buck up, Eddie saw the struggle and met the pair halfway.

"Thank you guys for coming. I'm glad you could make it." Eddie hugged Buck and then moved to hug Eleanor.

"Wouldn't miss it for the world," Buck smiled at his friend.

Carla came over with Christopher and began talking to Buck. While he was distracted, Eddie pulled Eleanor to the side. "How's it going?"

Eleanor sighed, "It's going.."

"Buck being difficult?"

"When isn't he?" The pair shared a laugh.

"If you ever need anything, I'm always here."

"I appreciate that. It's just so hard sometimes. All I want to do is help him but I don't know how and sometimes it seems like he doesn't even want help. And trying to talk to him, forget it. He's got his mind set, a hundred percent so there's no changing it. I just hope he doesn't get his hopes up."

"It's new to him too. I know it's hard but try not to let anything get to you. And he won't admit it but he needs and appreciates you a lot. Dealing with him right now makes you a saint. I know he can be difficult."

"I wouldn't trade it. I love him too much."

Eddie gave her another hug before someone else pulled him away. Eleanor stood by herself for a few moments before Maddie joined her. Maddie handed her a cup. "Thank you."

"About earlier, are you sure you're okay?"

"Yeah. I know he didn't mean anything toward me. He's dealing with a lot right now. I couldn't imagine possibly losing something I love. I understand having to change your whole life around but mine was by choice. He's so passionate about what he does, I really hope he doesn't lose it."

"I know, me too but I also want to be realistic with him. He should probably have a backup plan."

"He'll figure it out when it comes time." Maddie just nodded, they were clearly on different pages when it came to Buck but there was no need to make a scene, especially here. Eleanor walked away and went to stand by Buck's side.