Little things ~Ziam Mayne~

-9-

Liam
That's it, before I know it a tear rolls down my cheek, Zayn places his hand on my shoulder. "You're not alone okay? You care about me and I care about you, we always did that. So let's keep doing that? Okay? If you need help or feel sad you can just say it, we help each other" Zayn says, rubbing my shoulder with his thumb. I nod, tears are still rolling over my cheeks. "Ahw, come here Li." Zayn stands up and opens his arms, I stand up too and he hugs me tightly while I cry out on his shoulder.

"I'm sorry" I say. "Hey, why?" "That I'm not as strong as everyone thinks I am." "Oh Liam, no, you're so strong, look where you went trough" he says, stroking my back. We stand for a while like that. When I calmed down Zayn lets me go. "You okay again?" I nod. "Thank you Zayn" I say, he gently pats my shoulder. "No problem, you do so much for me." I smile. "I think I'm gonna go home in a bit" Zayn says. "That's okay! Should I bring you?" "If you want that would be great, since Louis went with the car." "Of course I want to!" I say, I pull Zayn in a hug again. "I would do anything for you" I mumble. When I let Zayn go again his cheeks are a bit flushed, it's making me a bit awkward. "Erm, yeah, I'll take you home."

When I'm home again I sight. There happend way to much. To much for my brain actually. It's silent in my house, now nobody's here, and honestly I miss Zayn a bit. We had really good talks and it was really fun. My phone buzzes, Harry's calling me. I pick up. "Hi!" "Hey Li! Is everything going well there?" I hear Harry ask. "Yeah! Everything's fine! And by you guys?" "Yeah good too!" "Good." "And how was the movie night?" "Well, if you just said I was wearing Zayn's hoodie there would've been less awkward moments" I say. I hear Harry chuckle. "Sorry mate."

"Where's Niall?" I ask. "In the shower." "Shouldn't you be with him then?" "Oh shut up Payne." I laugh. I hear a door in the background open. "Niall! Jesus, I'm calling with Liam can you just go away for a second, I'll..." I hear Harry say, he doesn't finish because Niall says something. Sadly I can't hear what. "You little shit" Harry mumbles. "I gotta go Li, I'll speak you later" he says fast, I laugh. "Okay! Bye Haz!" "Bye!"

It's raining outside, it's comforting me, to be honest. The sound that the rain makes on the glass helps me organising my thoughts a bit. I really love Zayn. How wrong it is I really do. But the thing is, if I tell him he'll maybe hate me. And that holds me back. I go to the note with the things from Harry. What if I sent Zayn just a random heart? Just to see how he reacts? Yeah, I'm gonna do that.

Zaynie <3
You: <3
Zaynie <3: You okay? The heart's kinda random <3
You: I'm fine, just wanted to sent you a heart :)

What was that for stupid answer? "I just wanted to sent you a heart" seriously Liam? Couldn't you sent something better? This is ridiculous. I want to delete the message, but Zayn already read it. Hopeless, I'm literally hopeless. And I'm sure Zayn thinks the same.

Zaynie <3
Zaynie <3: That's sweet :)

Sweet? He thinks it's sweet? Fuck, does he like me then? No, no, he doesn't, Zayn doesn't like me, that would be insane, that would be weird. No, Zayn really doesn't like me. Nope, I'm never gonna doubt about that anymore.

Zayn
I sight. Liam is in love with me, Louis was right. Speaking about Louis, the front door opens. "Oi, Zayn, didn't expect you here" he says when he walks into the living room. "You alright mate?" I nod. "Yeah, a bit sick but I'm fine" I say. Louis sits down next to me. "Was it fun?" I ask. Louis nods. "Yeah" "Who went with you?" "Oli, and Lottie and her boyfriend." "Ah." "What's wrong mate?" Louis asks. "You look a bit disoriented." I sight. "I think you were right..." Louis gives me a not understanding look. "I think Liam's in love with me..."

"Really?" Louis asks, a sparkle forms in his eyes. "Yeah." "Tell me lad." I tell everything what happened yesterday and today, from the fact that Liam was accidentally wearing my hoodie to the fact that he cared for me when I was sick. "Jesus man" Louis says. "That's a lot." I nod. "Wanna smoke a cigarette outside and talk about it?" He asks, I nod again. "Yeah, sounds good."

Louis and I know each other since high school, I met Louis a few years later then Liam, but we're still pretty close. I'm not as close with Louis as I am with Liam, but I'm with nobody as close as I am with Liam. When I was at university I moved in at Louis' apartment, he had some money problems, so I helped him with paying the rent. We've always been smoke buddies, if that doesn't sound cringe, it probably does, but okay.

"So" Louis starts. "What do you think?" I sight. "Dunno man, I really don't know" I say, he nods understanding. "I get that, sexuality is a big thing." I nod slowly. "But... Do you like Liam?" Louis asks. I shrug. "I don't know, as a best friend, yeah, but I don't know if I like him... like that..." It's silent for a moment. "I never really questioned my sexuality..." I say then. I look at Louis. "How'd you find out you were bi?" Louis smiles.

"There was this boy in my class, his name was Charlie, and I was just obsessed with him. Okay, obsessed isn't maybe the right word, but I really wanted to be with him and shit. We became pretty good friends, and we even shared a kiss at a party one time, but then he moved and I never saw him again, but the thing is, I noticed I was in love with him, and then I just started doing research and bisexual seemed like a good term for me. But you don't have to label yourself if you don't want to" he explains. "It took me a while to accept myself, but now I'm happy, I never had a big coming out or something, but the people I love know, and that's important to me."

I nod. "That makes sense, d'you still think about him sometimes?" Louis smiles and nods. "A lot, actually, I wished I stayed in touch with him... I tried to text him a while ago, but I think he switched phones." "That sucks..." I say. Louis nods. "Yeah, it does." He smiles. "I hope I'll meet him again one time." "I hope that too for you." Louis pats my shoulder. "Take your time to figure the whole thing between you and Liam out, the most important thing is that your happy, so take care of yourself, only you know what's the best."