book where i make snippets based on my feelings and emotions
some of these r gonna have a really wide format range btw
you might see like poems or journalism or pov stuff
maybe even just stuff you'd see in a normal book...lol
or just me talking casu...
i really didnt think id go back to this thing tbh. its really stupid and i just sounded edgy every time i wrote in this
so i guess this is just for the hell of it?? idk, something to get my feelings out so i dont have to bottle it up. i dont mind indirectly venting to people, if anything i prefer it
i think i keep getting lost in what could have been. it makes me act stupid, i keep thinking "maybe this time" but it never really does anything. i mean i dont benefit at all from it, it ends up putting me through the same shit
its annoying, having to deal with it. i can take it better but ill still feel it, lingering there. it makes me feel sick, like i should tear into my skin. i take that too though, because nothing would happen if i did. id just feel stupid about it, because its really not worth it
i think ill just sit here and wait for something good to happen to me this time i dont have the energy to put in the effort anymore.
i prayed so much to a god that i wasnt sure existed, a god that seemed to resent me the more i did, cursing me in place of a blessing. well, you cant tell me that wouldnt be some tiring shit. especially for my age
as unseemly as it might be to some people this isnt a directed post, nothing specific caused it, i just havent been in the brightest place lately. so its more like everything caused it
oh but thats all i guess. sorry to anybody who actually reads these
