Nine Shillings

Promises

London - 1842

'You've got blood on your face,' Josef said when I was hanging my jerkin up in the hallway.

I made to wipe it away. He stopped my hand, leaned in, and waited for permission.

I smiled.

He touched the side of my face and licked a smear of blood from the corner of my mouth with the tip of his tongue. He hovered, breath warming my face. He was right there, less than an inch away smelling of cut wood, beeswax, and... vomit.

I drew away slightly. 'Edward ate something he shouldn't again, didn't he?'

Josef nodded. 'Spoilt the moment, didn't it?'

'Little bit.' I drew him down and kissed him softly. 'Comes with the job though.'

He chuckled and touched his forehead to mine. 'I want you more than I remember wanting anyone,'

'Sounds like you're putting me on a pedestal,' I whispered. 'It's dangerous up there.'

'If you fall, I'll catch you.'

I grinned. 'You're ridiculous.'

'Only with you.'

He pressed my hand to his slow beating heart. 'I'm yours. Always.'

'I hear you're fickle.' I caressed his chest through his shirt.

'Not with you,' he said. 'You're not like the others.'

'The pedestal is getting higher.'

'They want one thing or another from me. Sex, money, power.' His thumb traced my lips. 'You want nothing.'

I glanced towards the ceiling. 'Maybe not nothing.'

'I'm trying to be romantic are you going to contradict me every time?'

I kissed him. 'Maybe.' I caressed his face. 'Tessa wants to take you from me. I won't let her.'

'I know.' He curled his fingers around mine and squeezed my hand. 'You're perfect. You don't fear me, or want to use me, you see me... The real me, not an idea of me.'

I hooked my fingers in his waistcoat. 'Is there a point to this conversation?'

'You know... I can't remember my mortal life. I know facts and stories but I don't remember.' He sighed. 'I know I had a wife and child, I couldn't tell you anything about them. I don't remember their faces or their names, I don't remember mine.' He kissed my palm. 'Eventually, you live so long you wonder what you're living for. What's the point?'

The silence stretched between us until I imagined I could hear the threads snapping, one by one.

'This is the point, you, Bran, our family,' he said. 'My life was empty and now it's full.'

I rubbed one of his waistcoat buttons with my thumb. 'A woman might get the idea you're thinking of doing something foolish.'

'I'm always doing foolish things.'

'Not that foolish.'

He smiled. 'Some might call it foolish.' He took a box from his pocket and offered it to me. 'This is my promise that I will be yours for the rest of my life.'

I opened the box. There was a gold band for a small finger and one for a bigger finger.

'Are you sure about this?' I asked. 'You know how I feel about promises.'

'I'm yours, body and soul.' He grinned. 'If I still have one.'

'I'm sure you do,' I said. 'And how do you feel about this, Bran?'

Bran peered around the library door with a dozing Edward against his shoulder and glanced between us. 'Comfortable.' For once he looked at ease.

I put the box down on the table beside me and took out the larger ring.

'I'll remember this, just so you know.' I slid the band onto the ring finger of his left hand.

He flexed his hand and looked at it, with a small smile, then he took the other ring from the box. 'I like to be memorable.' He slipped it onto the finger of my right hand. 'One each.'

'There you go, can't have anymore.' I cupped his face and kissed him. 'Have you two been talking about me behind my back?'

He shrugged. 'You said we had to communicate to make sure everyone was comfortable.'

I tapped the end of his nose. 'You're learning.'

He caught my hand and kissed my finger.

'Muma, my belly feels bad,' Edward said and wiped his wet face on Bran's soggy shoulder.

I stepped over to Bran and lifted Edward out of his arms and onto my hip, Bran and Josef had both been vomited on it was only fair I took the risk as well. 'That's why we tell you not to eat some things.'

'When Miss Ronni said the berries were bad, didn't know she meant all the berries,' he said as it was a shocking revelation. 'Looked tasty.'

'Were they?'

'No.' He shook his head. 'Was sick on Papa an' Dada, but they don't mind.'

Bran's expression suggested 'don't mind' wasn't quite the right phrase.

'Why bad berries look like tasty berries?' Edward asked.

'They're tasty to birds.' Josef mussed his hair. 'Some berries are for birds and animals and some are for people.'

'Need labels,' Edward mumbled rubbing his face. 'Like Dada's garden.'

'I'll teach you to tell the difference,' Josef said.

'Don't want no more berries.' He put his hand over his eyes. 'Berries are fibbers. Don't like fibbers.'

Bran coughed against his knuckles.

I gave him a look and kissed Edward's forehead. 'How about I tuck you up in bed and read you a bedtime story?'

'And snuggly cuddlies?'

I gave him a squeeze, which might've been unwise in the circumstances. 'You can have all the snuggly cuddlies you want.'

Bran leaned into the library then reappeared with a, thankfully, empty bucket and handed it to me. 'Just in case.'

I sighed. 'Come on then, let's get you a story.'

I was at the top of the stairs when Josef said under his breath to Bran, 'And she was never seen again.'

It could've been worse. All the children could've been sick at once. Again.

So I told myself.