When 45-year-old Theodore Narrator gets fired from his job as Employee 528 at a large company, he is at a loss for words. His life is already going down the gutter, and this feels like it will be the straw to break the camel's back. But one fateful...
The familiar chime of the doors sounded, and Theo stepped out of the elevator. Floor 11 was really nice-looking. The center of it was completely open, spare for a navy carpet and a few chairs. Around the edges of the wide-open space were some offices, each with a number from one through nine. He walked over to number three. Ant, Accounting Director & Human, Assistant (accounting director), the nameplate at the door read. He turned the knob and stepped inside.
"Yes, perfect. Column A should equal to...," narrated Ant, once again perched on Human's shoulder. "did i ever tell you how fast you are at typing? It must be the fact that every time your hands rest on a keyboard, you sprout five to seven extra fingers- oh, hey... what was it? ...Office Drone?"
"Uh... yes. You're right." Theo scratched the back of his head nervously. They had just met that day, could he really trust a stranger to keep such a big secret? Ant was a very rational person. He'd know better than to tell the CEO anything. But then again, he was a RATIONAL person. Rational people, such as Cura, sorry, scratch that, such as Theo's brothers, cared about their jobs and usually listened to their bosses. If only there was a way to check Ant's loyalty to the boss before-
"Well? I leave you alone for two hours and suddenly you come rushing up here like you're being chased by the devil or the CEO's secretary," Ant said, interrupting Theo's moral quandary. "Sit down. You look pretty shaken up." Human gestured to a chair next to the window. Theo walked over and sat down, looking out at the plaza where the announcement was held, just a day before... the announcement!
"Okay, well, you've clearly worked here a while, and, uh, I just wanted to ask what you thought of the announcement that the CEO made yesterday," fibbed Theo, looking back over at Ant and Human. They both looked at each other and shrugged. Or at least, Theo thought they did, Ant was too tiny and Human was... well, Theo didn't know if the human-shaped-ooze had shoulders to shrug.
"Well, i mean, you've come all this way, so i might as well give you my opinion...," Ant sighed. "It was rubbish. Complete and utter rubbish. Sure, I respect the man for giving me this teletransporter," he held up his wrist, where a glowing yellow mechanical watch sat, "but I have a real weird feeling about Ja- The CEO, as a whole. He seems different these days. More stressed out, even a bit neurotic."
"-OH THANK GOD," blurted Theo.
"What?"
"I was testing you. You seemed reliable- TOO reliable. I thought that maybe-"
"...I would tell the boss that it was you who broke into his office?"
Theo's heart stopped. He went completely pale. How did he...?
"Don't freak out, it's just that I have a knack for this kind of thing," added Ant, who was, with a yellow flash, standing on the coffee table in front of Theo. "I was a therapist, plus I have a degree in psychology. I can see the guilt in the back of your eyes. The messiness of your hair. The fact that you needed to see me so quickly. So. There's one thing I want to know. How on earth did you do it?" He laughed. Theo breathed a sigh of relief.
"Well, I kind of just... broke in. My friend Lovebug convinced me to, and... some crazy stuff happened."
"What kind of crazy stuff?"
"You see, that's what I came to talk to you about. Neither of you are human-"
"I am."
"Oh, well, never mind then. I guess, i don't know if I'm human."
"How so? Imposter syndrome, or-"
"No, i quite literally don't know if I'm human. I was in the office, the guards came in, and i was so shocked and terrified that i somehow- somehow..."
"Go on?"
"I looked down at my hands and they- they weren't mine. Not in the metaphorical sense, either. I had... as lovebug called it, even though i hate using comic-book terms, shapeshifted into the CEO."
Ant's eyes widened.
"Oooo-kay. Not at all what I was expecting... I'm sorry I'm asking, but could you possibly demonstrate?"
Theo closed his eyes. After concentrating for a few seconds, he opened them again and put his head in his hands.
"I can't control it. It just... happens, I guess."
"Well, by the looks of it, you didn't try too hard. What about I give you more than three seconds to try?"
"Okay... I'm not confident at all, though."
"You might want to change that."
Theo closed his eyes again. He concentrated really hard for about ten seconds, and then decided to relax a bit. His mind wandered. The past day had been as crazy as a fever dream. The definitions, the table, the shift, the nightmare... the nightmare. That was the most terrifying thing. If the CEO found him out, he probably would be killed. And, on top of that, he couldn't even leave. How could this day get any worse? He just wanted to be home. Home, where he could curl up under a blanket and hide from all of his worries. He just wanted to shrink down to the size of a flea and hide. Under a drawer or in a cupboard or something. As if that could help anything. Suddenly the tingling feeling returned. He felt like he was falling, slowly, almost like a feather.
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When the feeling subsided, he slowly opened his eyes. Standing next to him was Ant, eyes filled with confusion and wonder. He leaned back into the back of the chair, only to fall over when he found it wasn't where it was supposed to be. He stood up, and realized that he was standing at the same height as Ant.
"Well, well, well... Not confident, eh?" Ant punched his shoulder.
"I... i don't know what happened." Theo said... shocked. "This wasn't what i was trying to do, for the record."
"I know. But it's a start." Ant took a deep breath. "Drone. Whatever it is you're going through, it's going to get better."
"Really, i don't know what's going on-", gasped Theo, a tear rolling down his cheek.
"Stop. Breathe. Floor Eleven, office three. Here when you need me. I promise."
