Billy loomis x Stu macher one shots || Book five

"I feel...Blah."

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Every parent thinks that their children have it easy, but what was easy about being a teenager? Parents simply forget that they were once teenagers as well.

Life wasn't easy for Stu Macher. Yeah, he had it all. His parents were rich, and he had a perfect like.

Yeah, right. Stu macher life was far from perfect. His parents may be rich, but what was great about being rich if your family never spent time with you? If your parents never paid any attention to you.

What was great about having all that money if all the friends you have are fake? What was so great about it? Stu didn't have a clue what was so great about it.

His life was was shit but nobody seemed to notice or care. Did they even notice when he failed to keep a smile on his face?

Did they even care if he stopped being the class clown? Did they even notice that he spaced out more than usual?

Stu would just imagine the world without him in it. His friends wouldn't care if he died. His parents probably won't even notice that he died.

Nobody would notice if he died. It was just so simple. That fact was just something that kept stu thinking.

What would happen if he killed himself?

- -
[Stu's pov.]

I hate society, and most of all, I hate people. The world is beautiful if you really stop and look at it. People hate beauty, and all they do is ruin it because they're jealous of it.

People have been ruining the earth and the people in it.  I'm pretty sure humanity is what's going to kill us all one day.

The wind softly blew, and I couldn't feel the coldness anymore. I've been on this bridge looking down at the water below for at least four hours.

It was pretty cold outside due to it almost being winter. I only have my warm sweater and the leather jacket I stole from Billy a while ago.

I couldn't feel any part of my body anymore. I was numb due to the cold or maybe something else. I don't know or care.

Why should I care about myself if nobody is going to care about me? I'm just another sad tragedy that nobody would care about.

They would just write in the newspaper, and people would say, "Oh, that poor boy." Before throwing it away and never speaking about it ever again.

Do you know what I hate about people the most? Is that they judge. They judge us without even getting to know us.

Just cause some of us are rich doesn't mean we're rich spoiled fucks. Do you know how many times being called me a spoiled fuck? I don't, I lost count.

People call me a lot of names. Heck, even when I'm donating the stuff, my parents get me for Christmas or a birthday present.

People call me selfish and sneer at me, but I could care less. The children were happy with the toys I gave them. Fuck their parents.

I didn't need the toys, I never needed them. The only thing I've ever wanted was love. Love from my parents, love from somebody.

I'm never going to get that, am I? I see people who love each other every day, and I've always wondered what I did , you know?

What did I do that made me so unlovable? Huh? That was the question that I kept in my head for years.

Why was I born in the world if I wasn't going to be loved? Some people would say, "Get over yourself!"

"You are not the only person in this whole Damm universe!" I know some people can live without love, and I lived like that for most of my life.

But aren't you just tired of it? Of not being loved? Of just existing without a purpose? I am, I'm just tired.

I'm tired of just constantly existing for people who don't even care about me. A deep sighed escaped me.

I lifted my head, and I looked up at the dark sky. The stars were beautiful from this spot. Maybe I can join the stars.

"Stu?" I look behind me and see Billy. He's my best friend but he has a life and he doesn't care about me. I get it, he has two loving parents , he's rich and he could get any best friend he wanted.

I don't know why he chose me. I was just the annoying kid who always picked last or always ignored. Surprisingly, Billy didn't ignore me, and he always picked me first.

It was weird, but Billy was a weirdo , so I didn't think much about it. "What are you doing just sitting there?" He questioned, coming to stand beside me. He leaned his arms on the railing , and I could feel the heat radiating off of him.

Billy was like a walking furnace. He didn't get cold during the winter, and he was practically dying during the summer.

"I'm just thinkin'," I replied ,"about what?" Billy questioned, and I shrugged, "Just some stuff."

"Are you okay?" He asked, and I looked at him slightly surprised, "what?" He sighed

"You seem depressed. Are you okay?" He asked, and I sighed , "I'm not depressed Billy and I'm not sad either. I don't know how I feel honestly." I told him

"I feel..blah. I think I've been feeling kinda blah for a while now." I told him , "that makes sense." He said

"It does?" I questioned, and he nodded, pulling out a cigarette and lit it up. I waved the smoke from my face, coughing a bit.

"Yeah, it does." He said, ' You planning on jumping?" He questioned, his brown eyes meeting my blue eyes.

"Honestly, Billy? Yeah," I chuckled ,"I've been sitting here for four hours. I'm already numb from the cold, and if I just fall, I wouldn't feel it, and I would just stay there as the water fills my lungs and.." I trailed off, a small chuckle leaving me.

"I'll jump right after you if you do." Billy said, and I blinked, "What?"

"The only good thing in this fucked up world is you, stu. If you're not in it, then I'm not going to be in either. I'll follow you." Billy said, flicking his cigarette off the bridge.

"You willin' to die for me?" I asked, and he nodded, a small smile on his face. "Yeah. I am."

"Why?" I questioned, and Billy shrugged, "Guess that what you do when you love someone. You're willing to die for them."

I could feel my cheeks heating up as my heart started to beat faster. "Y - you love me?"

"Yeah. I do. I love you more than you know." I smiled ,"that's all I ever wanted." I got off the railing, and I threw my arms around Billy's waist, hugging him.

"You're freezing." Billy mumbled, taking off his jacket as wrapping it around me. "I love you too, Billy."

"Come on. Let's get you back home. I'm surprised your lips haven't turned blue yet." I placed a small kiss on his cheek, and I could see his cheeks turning red.

"Your lips are cold." He said, and I laughed."Come on, I'll give you a Piggyback ride." I giggled as Billy kneeled down in front of me.

After a while, we were almost my place. I played with Billy's hair, "Thank you, Billy. For loving me."

"You don't have to thank me for loving you, stu." Billy replied, "I do."

I guess, someone in this beautiful fucked up world does love me and I couldn't be more grateful for Billy.

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Word count - 1290

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